


To the end, we will be

by Mialienes



Category: Super Junior, Super Junior-M
Genre: Daemons, His Dark Materials Inspired, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-25
Updated: 2015-08-25
Packaged: 2018-04-14 16:15:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 32,685
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4571136
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mialienes/pseuds/Mialienes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Kyuhyun first meets Zhou Mi in the orphanage as a child, he never could have guessed the journey it would take him on.</p><p>Perhaps he should've.</p><p>Warnings: homophobia</p>
            </blockquote>





	To the end, we will be

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the 2015 round of the [QMidayeveryday.](http://qmidayeveryday.livejournal.com/)
> 
> Also while this is inspired by the His Dark Materials series, this fic is set in its own universe rather than the HDM one.

_Out of the nothingness of sleep,  
The slow dreams of Eternity,  
There was a thunder on the deep:  
I came, because you called to me._

 

\---

 

A metallic object washed ashore, glinting in the sunlight, its surface half covered in sand as it was deposited near Zhou Mi's feet.

Zhou Mi crouched down to pick it up, kneeling in the wet sand, the water soaking the knees of his pants. It was a medallion. It felt strangely warm in his palm considering the temperature of the water. As Zhou Mi ran his thumb across the markings, it sent him a jolt - a memory - as if the metal had sparked it off like electricity jumping through his veins. 

Zhou Mi met Shi's eyes, knowing that she had remembered at exactly the same time. 

"Where is he? Where are they?" Zhou Mi asked her, and his daemon shook her head. 

"Not here." She was in her cat form, tail flicking from side to side as if the ocean wind was blowing it to and fro like the coastal grass on the dunes. "I would know if they were." 

Zhou Mi's forehead creased and he stood up, brushing the sand from his clothes. He bent down to lift Shi into his arms, and her tail wrapped around his bicep. She purred at him, rubbing her head affectionately under his chin.

Together they watched the waves. The tide was coming in and the water was gradually seeping higher and higher up the beach. They couldn't stay too long - Zhou Mi's mother would come looking for him soon. 

He felt a pang of regret at that, at how she would feel when… Zhou Mi cut that thought off before it could make him change his mind. 

He tucked the object away into his pocket and hoisted his knapsack higher up his back, straightening the straps on his shoulders. He said to Shi, "Are you ready?" 

She butted his face with her head in response. "Yes." 

Zhou Mi walked into the ocean and together they forgot. 

 

\----

 

With a grunt and a final firm shove, Siwon sent Kyuhyun rocketing upwards, propelling him over the edge of the roof. 

Kyuhyun scrambled, using the momentum to haul himself up. Lya, his daemon, was already up there, having transformed earlier into a monkey. She'd been enjoying teasing him with her agileness, and not for the first time Kyuhyun was envious that daemons could shape shift - when they were young, at least. His climbing skills were hampered by his human body. 

"Are you up?" Siwon called from below.

Kyuhyun laid on his stomach to peer down at him over the ledge and two faces returned his gaze - Siwon, and Siwon's daemon, who'd decided to take on the form of a small orangutan. "Yup," Kyuhyun confirmed. "Just let me secure the rope and I'll pass it down."

He carefully stood, arms outstretched as he test his balance, and slowly stepped his way across the slippery slate tiles to the chimney. Once it was in reach he unravelled the loop of rope that he'd tucked into his waist belt, securing it tightly around the stone stack. He tugged the rope firmly, checking its hold, before tossing it over the roof's edge in Siwon's direction. 

"Catch!" he shouted, and watched as the rope went taut as it took Siwon's weight. As he waited for his friend to join him, Kyuhyun took the opportunity to catch his breath and look out over the surrounding landscape. 

Lya, bored of climbing now that Kyuhyun was on the roof, had shifted to a falcon and he could feel her joy and glee at being so high. 

They weren't meant to be up there. The building was a good five stories tall, the pitched roof made of sharply angled slate, and the ground? The ground was a long way down. 

But that was partly why it was so exciting. From up there, Kyuhyun could see for miles and miles. The orphanage was surrounded by an expanse of green countryside and forest. In the distance were vast mountain ranges from which slim ribbons of water snaked their way downwards, meandering into the green fields below. Scattered around was evidence of a few small villages and towns, but mostly the orphanage was isolated from human contact - only accessible by a single, dusty narrow road. It was as if it had been purposely placed in this location as a dumping ground for children who needed to be forgotten.

Kyuhyun had grown up in the orphanage with no recollection of a previous life outside its stone walls - much like all the other boys. They were all male, of various ages. Apparently there was a corresponding female orphanage, about a week's travel away, but few of the boys had ever been any further than the closest village and none of them could confirm this personally. 

Life inside the orphanage was happy enough. None of them knew anything else and the orphanage staff - though somewhat gruff and stern looking - were at least kind and raised them with a kind of distant fondness. Plus Kyuhyun had his friends. His closest friends were slightly older than him - Siwon, Donghae and Hyukjae. Even though Kyuhyun was the youngest of their group, they often deferred to his suggestions - whether it was playing knights on the large front lawn with swords they'd fashioned out of tree branches, or hide and seek in the kitchens (a game that Cook particularly despised), or conquering the roof like a mountain adventurer. 

Siwon clambered next to Kyuhyun on the roof, and he pointed into the distance, one hand coming up to shade his eyes. "Someone's coming!"

Sure enough, a cloud of dust was heading towards them on the straight road, kicked into the air by an approaching covered wagon that was pulled by a single horse. The orphanage didn't see many visitors, with the exception of a weekly food and mail delivery that arrived like clockwork each Wednesday afternoon at 2pm. The boys had seen the food and mail truck yesterday, so this must've been something else. 

Siwon's daemon shifted into a hawk, larger than Lya's form, joining her in circling in the sky. All four of them watched as the wagon came through the orphanage gates and pulled up to the building's entrance.

Kyuhyun watched with interest as the elderly man sitting at the front of the wagon stepped down, his white hair and somewhat frail build easily visible from their vantage point on the roof. The old man stepped to the wagon door, opening it. There was a pause, as if the man was speaking to the occupant inside, but eventually out came a tall young boy, his daemon draped around his neck in the shape of a large cat. 

The boy looked to be about Siwon's age - approximately 13 - and though it was hard to tell from the distance, he seemed to be of a similar height, although lanky and thin where Siwon was broad. The boy's hair was jet black, and brushed neatly to one side, framing his long face. Kyuhyun was positive that he'd never seen him before and yet he felt a twinge of familiarity. 

"Do you think he's coming to stay?" Siwon asked curiously. Neither of them could remember a teenage boy ever arriving at the orphanage. New arrivals were always - at least in their recollection - babies. Occasionally children left, to be adopted out they supposed, but it was rare and the population was normally consistent.

"He must be," Kyuhyun confirmed, more curious than he wanted to let on. Lya came to settle on his shoulder, shifting into a sparrow so she could speak quietly into his ear.

"Didn't Sir want to speak to you?"

"Damn!" Kyuhyun cursed, suddenly remembering his earlier conversation. Kyuhyun had been caught up in the adventure of finally conquering the roof, completely forgetting the request.

Sir ran the orphanage. He was of undetermined age and practically a giant, towering over most men and not just children. He had a craggy face, thick eyebrows from which his sharp eyes peered, and shoulders built like a mountain. Despite his appearance he was softly spoken, running the entire place with kindness and intelligence rather than force and fear. 

His staff respected him and his charges adored him, including Kyuhyun, so for him to forget Sir's simple request made him feel terribly guilty. Earlier that day, at breakfast in the eating hall, Sir had pulled him aside and asked him to report to his office as soon as afternoon lessons were complete. 

Except, when they had been released to play, Siwon had approached Kyuhyun with excitement, having finally sourced a coil of rope, and Sir's request completely slipped Kyuhyun's mind. 

"Talk to you later!" Kyuhyun shouted at Siwon as he made his way off the roof. He carefully lowered himself on to the ledge below the roof line, gingerly walking his way back to the open attic window where they'd gained entry. Once safely inside the building he sprinted through the corridors, down several flights of stairs, coming panting to a stop outside the door of Sir's office. 

He had raised his hand to knock when the door suddenly opened, with Sir standing there. Behind him, inside the office, Kyuhyun could see the two strangers - the old man and the boy - apparently about to be led out, plus Ryeowook, one of the other orphanage boys. 

"Ahh, Kyuhyun," Sir said kindly, looking neither disappointed at his lateness, nor surprised to see him. Sir's eagle daemon peered sharply down at him. "You look like you've just come from an adventure. You must tell me about it later." He gently gestured for Kyuhyun to step aside, and then he turned back to speak to the new boy. 

"Ryeowook will show you to your room," he told him and Kyuhyun stepped aside to let them all pass as they came out of Sir's office in single file. 

The new boy's daemon looked at Kyuhyun curiously with her bright emerald eyes as they walked past, though the boy himself was downcast, his back stiff and straight. From this close, Kyuhyun could see that his clothes were neat and of good quality, though of an unusual style. His face was set in a neutral expression, but Kyuhyun thought that his eyes looked a bit red. He kept his gaze firmly on the floor, but the boy's daemon flicked her tail from her position in his arms, her attention now drawn to Lya. 

Kyuhyun could feel Lya perk at the attention, preening a little as she fluffed up her feathers. She was still in her sparrow form, perched on his shoulder, and Kyuhyun wondered at her reaction. She wasn't normally prideful as Kyuhyun wasn't either - daemons were thought to be a physical extension of a person's inner self - although Kyuhyun often thought that Lya was much more intelligent than he was. Not that he would ever say that aloud to her. 

"Do we know them?" he asked her when the group had left, unable to shake the feeling that somehow he'd met that boy before. Lya had to consider his question for a long moment before she answered.

"No, I don't think so." Her voice didn't seem wholly convinced. 

 

\---

 

Later, at dinner, all talk was of the new boy.

"His name is Zhou Mi," Heechul said knowingly. He was one of the oldest in Kyuhyun's wider group of friends, and seemed to know everything about everything. His daemon sat in his lap, currently a sleek ferret, and Heechul stroked her gently as he spoke. 

"I heard that his parents are dead," Donghae said, to which his best friend Hyukjae scoffed.

"Of course they're dead, stupid. Why else would he be at an orphanage?"

"But," Donghae said with excitement, leaning across the table to share the gossip, "I heard that he killed them."

The eating hall was just that - a room in which they ate all their meals. It was large, in the manner of a banquet room, and filled with rows and rows of wooden tables and chairs. Candles and lamps lit the room in the evening. 

Kyuhyun looked around - the new boy, Zhou Mi, hadn't appeared yet, although he saw Ryeowook with his friends a few tables down. Kyuhyun wondered which room Zhou Mi had been allocated to. The boys slept in dorms, each housing a maximum of 6, and most dorms had at least one spare bed. Kyuhyun often wondered about the size of the orphanage. It was built for a huge population, and although the current population of approximately 100 boys was fairly sizeable, it could've easily housed double that amount. 

"Killed his parents?" Hyukjae said in disbelief, giving Donghae a shove. "That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard!" 

"That's what I heard," Donghae insisted stubbornly. "Caved their heads in with a hammer." 

The two began to bicker between them as to the likelihood of such an event when a hush came over the entire room.

Zhou Mi had arrived.

His daemon had shifted into the form of a bear, as tall as he was, and she glared menacingly at everyone as Zhou Mi walked quietly through the rows until he came to an empty seat. Everyone watched as he sat, unashamed in their staring, but when he didn't do anything interesting - not even acknowledging the other occupants sitting at the table - gradually everyone lost interest and went back to their conversations. 

A couple of rows away, Kyuhyun could see Zhou Mi sit there quietly. HIs daemon hovered behind him, whispering into his ear, but he remained expressionless and didn't respond.

He didn't look like the kind of person who could hurt someone, Kyuhyun thought as food started to arrive, trays holding steaming bowls of stew and thick chunks of bread. Lya agreed.

"He's not," she confirmed, now a wee mouse settled in his hair. Her whiskers tickled as she spoke. 

"How do you know?" he asked her as he dug a spoon into his stew. 

"I just know," she said haughtily, and he knew that she wouldn't tell him any more for the moment.

Conversations in the room quietened as the boys started to eat. Kyuhyun wasn't watching - not really - but he noticed that Zhou Mi made no move towards his own food. It sat there in front of him, untouched. His daemon seemed agitated, but he didn't seem to be paying her any attention. 

Siwon noticed Kyuhyun's distraction. "He mustn't be hungry," he said, speaking through a mouthful of food. "I'll eat his fill if he doesn't want it." 

"He's probably poisoned it," Donghae replied, only half jokingly, ripping his piece of bread in half and tossing it on Siwon's tray. Siwon was growing the fastest out of all of them and was constantly hungry. "Greedy boys would be an easy kill for someone like that." 

"He's not a killer!" Hyukjae exclaimed in exasperation, but so loudly that his voice rung out across the room. Kyuhyun saw Zhou Mi's shoulders jerk at the words, and it was apparent that the boy knew they were talking about him. All of a sudden he pushed himself to his feet, moving to stalk his way out of the hall, his daemon hurrying behind after him. 

 

\---

 

Sir poked his head into the library. "Bed time," he told them. 

"Yes Sir," the boys chorused. 

After dinner there was always a couple of hours of free time before bed. Sometimes Kyuhyun and his friends played cards with the others in the games room, or they wandered the halls looking for some fun. Tonight though, they were in the library, telling each other ghost stories - stories that were becoming increasingly outlandish and gory.

Siwon seemed relieved to see Sir. He didn't particularly like ghost stories or the supernatural. Kyuhyun himself wasn't sure if he believed in any of that stuff, but he liked to tell stories, and it was fun to see Siwon, normally very composed and mature, jump. 

The group trooped off to the washrooms to get ready for bed, taking turns to pump water to brush their teeth and clean up. Kyuhyun rubbed a wet rag over his face and neck, shivering a little. The water that the orphanage drew from its pumps and wells was always cold - feeling like it was just a few degrees above frozen. 

Once he was suitably clean - or as clean as he was going to get - he followed the others to their dorm. 

Donghae was in the lead, and he stopped suddenly, causing everyone to crash into the back of him. "Oh!" he exclaimed nervously.

Kyuhyun peered around him to find Zhou Mi inside their room, standing in the middle. He seemed unsure. His daemon had shifted again, back to her wildcat form, and her tail bristled at Donghae's exclamation. Zhou Mi laid a hand on her head, as if to calm her, but she snarled at them. 

Donghae, shocked, seemed unwilling to move any further, blocking the entrance while the others shifted nervously behind him. Kyuhyun rolled his eyes at them before pushing them all aside so he could enter. 

"Hello," he said to Zhou Mi as he approached. "I'm Kyuhyun." He stuck out his hand and Zhou Mi stared at it for a moment before gingerly taking it. 

"Zhou Mi," he said softly in response. His daemon had settled on her haunches, and was staring up at Kyuhyun suspiciously. 

"There's a free bed on my bunk," Kyuhyun told him, gesturing over to it. "I normally sleep on the top but if you want - I can swap?" 

Zhou Mi blinked at him slowly. "I don't mind sleeping on the bottom," he confirmed. Zhou Mi's belongings had already been transferred to the room - there was a knapsack in the corner - and Kyuhyun watched with interest as Zhou Mi carried it over to their bunk. Most of the boys didn't own anything, and Kyuhyun wondered what was in it. 

Kyuhyun reached up to his bed to grab his pyjamas from where he'd stashed them under the pillow. When he finished changing he found Zhou Mi standing by the bed, looking down at the floor, still dressed in the clothes he came in. 

"Do you need some help?" Kyuhyun asked him politely. The others - Siwon, Donghae and Hyukjae - had already changed and climbed into bed, but he could sense them watching them. 

Zhou Mi shook his head. "No, thank you," he said politely.

"Right." Kyuhyun wasn't sure what to say next. "We'll have to blow the lamps out soon - you probably want to be in bed by then. It gets pretty dark in here." He'd just started to climb the ladder to his rung when Zhou Mi looked up and spoke. 

"Good night, Kyuhyun," he said gravely before finally making moves to undress. Kyuhyun left him to it, pulling himself up and into his bed, Lya settling on his pillow beside his head. It didn't take long for him to fall asleep.

 

\---

 

Kyuhyun wasn't too sure what woke him, but possibly it was because he could feel Lya quivering next to him. 

"What's wrong?" he whispered groggily to her. The more he woke, he more he could feel her anxiety. 

"Zhou Mi," she told him, and as Kyuhyun listened in the darkness he could hear tiny hushed sobs from the bunk below him. 

He carefully climbed down, leaning into Zhou Mi's bunk. "Zhou MI?" he whispered, trying not to wake the others. It appeared that Zhou Mi was asleep too, but he was crying in his sleep, little heart wrenching sobs as he shivered, almost uncontrollably. "Zhou Mi?" Kyuhyun said again, shaking him gently to wake him. His skin felt like ice. 

Zhou Mi woke with a gasp, eyes flying open. Kyuhyun could only just make out his panicked expression in the moonlight that was streaming in through the window. "It's okay," he soothed. "It was just a dream." 

"A -- a dream?"

"Yes, it's just a dream." Zhou Mi hadn't stopped shivering, so Kyuhyun followed up with a question. "Are you cold?"

"No - no --" Zhou Mi said, and Kyuhyun knew it was a lie from the way his teeth chattered. Zhou Mi's daemon was curled up against him, on the side nearest to the wall, and he was so cold that even her body couldn't keep him warm. He clutched on to her tightly. 

Kyuhyun sighed. "Move over," he said, disappearing quickly to reach up to grab his blanket. "Move over," he repeated when he returned, and Zhou Mi shuffled over, confused. Kyuhyun climbed into bed beside him, underneath the covers, and draped the second blanket on top of that. "Go to sleep," he said, turning on to his side, his back to Zhou Mi. He wasn't aware that he waited until Zhou Mi's shaking stopped before he was able to drift off to sleep himself. 

 

\---

 

"He could've murdered you in your sleep!" Donghae said to Kyuhyun at breakfast. "I mean, look at that daemon of his. She's always so fierce. It's a wonder she didn't bite your head off. Where is he anyway?"

After waking up, the boys had all headed to the washrooms to clean up before breakfast. Zhou Mi had lingered behind, even after Kyuhyun had stopped in the doorway, asking, "Are you coming?" 

Zhou Mi had nodded, telling him that he would meet them there, but they hadn't seen him since. 

Kyuhyun shrugged, biting into his piece of toast, slathered with honey. Despite the fact that it had already gone cold between the kitchens and food hall, it was one of Kyuhyun's favourite things. Cook baked loaves fresh each day for lunch and dinner, cutting thick slices by hand with his big knife. Any pieces that were left over he toasted over the kitchen fire. 

"You should sleep in your own bed," Siwon said, a little admonishingly. He was always a stickler for the rules, even the unspoken ones. 

"He was cold," Kyuhyun explained, and Donghae and Hyukjae both nodded in understanding. They had all grown up in the orphanage, and were acclimatised to the heating - or lack of it. Zhou Mi looked like a boy from a good family, with his fine, abet unusual, clothes and straight posture, and everyone knew that good families had money that could pay for heating and thick blankets. The orphanage had neither. Besides, it was a common habit in the dorms - when the boys at the orphanage were very young many would sleep in piles - somewhat like puppies. 

This habit was discouraged as the boys became older and they became aware of the unspoken implication - boys don't do that. Boys don't get too close to one another. Boys don't touch each other in certain ways. Younger boys could be physically affectionate with one another, could hug and hold hands, but as they got older it was frowned upon. 

And yet, behind closed doors, Kyuhyun knew that there were some in the orphanage who touched a bit too much, who hugged a little too tightly, who perhaps loved someone they weren't supposed to. There was always rumours about these boys, and once they came out those boys were immediately outcast by the others. You couldn't be different in _that way_. It was wrong and unacceptable. Kyuhyun didn't really understand it though. Who deemed it to be too much? And why was it so wrong? 

Perhaps he was just too young to understand.

Kyuhyun was on his second piece of toast when Zhou Mi walked in, appearing a little lost. "Hey! Zhou Mi! Over here!" Kyuhyun yelled after quickly swallowing his mouthful, waving his hand in the air until he caught Zhou Mi's attention.

"Kyuhyun!" Donghae hissed, ducking his head as Zhou Mi approached. Kyuhyun ignored him, shifting over a little to make space for Zhou Mi.

"Where were you?" he asked the older boy as he sat down, his food tray being placed carefully on the table in front of him. 

"Sir wanted to speak to me," Zhou Mi replied quietly, his shoulders curving into his body, as if he was trying to make himself small and invisible. He held his daemon to his chest with one arm, against his heart. She was in her cat form again and she nudged her head up against his chin as if she was trying to comfort him. 

"He's so confused," Lya told Kyuhyun quietly into his ear, her sparrow wings flicking against his skin. 

"Why?" Kyuhyun asked her but she flew above his head and didn't respond. 

After breakfast it was time for morning lessons. Each of the boys took their trays to the bin, scraping any food remnants away and stacking the trays neatly beside it. Kyuhyun noticed that Zhou Mi hadn't eaten much during breakfast - had swallowed a couple of bites of toast and taken small sips of tea, but when the bell rang they all had to get moving. For some reason Kyuhyun felt slightly responsible for the new boy, and he said to him, "This way, Zhou Mi. It's time for lessons. You can sit with me."

At that, Zhou Mi looked up and gave him a small smile, following behind. 

Due to the shortage of teachers, classes were held in mixed age groups. Even though Kyuhyun was in the younger range he picked up on the ideas faster than the others and often found lessons boring. He yawned, doing his best to concentrate and not lay his head down on his desk. Beside him, Zhou Mi was idly scribbling in his workbook rather than taking notes.

Kyuhyun leaned over, "What did Sir want to talk to you about?"

Zhou Mi hand stilled and Kyuhyun couldn't help but notice what he was drawing. "Umm. Nothing really. He was just asking me how I was settling in." He'd sketched a scene - oddly detailed in small precise lines - what looked like waves and waves on an endless ocean. Kyuhyun was about to ask him about it when Teacher called his name.

"Kyuhyun! Are you listening?" 

"Yes!" he lied, sitting up straight and turning his attention towards the blackboard. When he was able to sneak another look, Zhou Mi had turned the page over and the paper was blank.

 

\---

 

After morning lessons there was an hour of chores, followed by a sports or physical activity, with all the boys being sent outside to let off some energy before lunch. Today their task was to run laps of the grounds - an activity Kyuhyun hated - and he plodded along slowly behind the others. In fact, he was so slow that soon he was overtaken by others. He wasn't surprised to see Siwon in the lead - he seemed to love all physical activity and his legs were built for running. Not too far behind were Donghae and Hyukjae, who did most things together, and Donghae gave Kyuhyun a nudge as they passed, almost pushing Kyuhyun over. 

"C'mon slowpoke!" 

Kyuhyun put his head down and panted, willing for the hour to be over soon. His lungs felt like they were going to burst. His legs hurt and he knew that he'd slowed to a crawl. 

Zhou Mi caught up to him on his second lap around. His daemon was currently a hare, loping along easily. Kyuhyun could see Zhou Mi giving him side glances, although he didn't say anything.

"I -- hate -- running --" Kyuhyun explained, panting, sweat dripping into his eyes. Lya didn't particularly like it either, and she was currently resting as a little mouse in the pocket of his shorts. 

Zhou Mi still didn't speak but he slowed his pace to match Kyuhyun's and they ran together. Somehow this distracted Kyuhyun enough that he stopped thinking about how much he hated the exertion, finally reaching that zone that Siwon always talked about - where the pain stopped - and for the first time ever, Kyuhyun felt as if he could run forever. 

When the teacher blew the whistle, Kyuhyun had no idea how much time had passed, or how many laps they'd run. Normally he would've counted down every single second, each footstep laborious and tortuous, but today his mind had been clear and free. Even Siwon mentioned it, clapping him on the shoulder as they made their way to the washrooms. 

"You didn't look like you hated that as much as you normally do. Perhaps we'll make a runner out of you yet!"

Somehow, Kyuhyun doubted that very much.

There was always a flurry in the washrooms after sports, as everyone scrambled to clean up so they could hurry to lunch. Kyuhyun had lost Zhou Mi as soon as the whistle had sounded, with Zhou Mi racing off faster than Kyuhyun could react, and although he kept an eye out for him he didn't see him in the washrooms. 

Still, Kyuhyun made sure that the seat next to him was free when he sat down for lunch. 

"You're saving that seat for _him_ , aren't you?" Donghae asked, almost accusingly. "Is he your new best friend now?" 

They were at the age where best friends were Very Important Things, but Zhou Mi certainly wasn't Kyuhyun's new best friend - he was pretty sure that it was too early to say that they were friends at all. He told Donghae this. 

"He's weird," Donghae said in response. "He's scary and weird, and who knows what kind of person he is!"

"He's not weird, he's new," Kyuhyun told him. "Think of how hard it must be - if it was you, you'd want people to be nice to you, right?" 

Donghae scrunched up his face, grudgingly saying, "I suppose. But what about the rumour that he - y'know." He pulled his thumb across his neck in emphasis.

From next to him Hyukjae rolled his eyes. "Give it a rest. Does he seriously look like he could kill his parents?" Hyukjae had a good point. Zhou Mi was so thin and lanky that a strong wind could probably knock him over. 

"Suppose," Donghae grudgingly said again. 

"I think you're being very noble," Siwon suddenly announced to Kyuhyun. "We should all be more like you." Then to Hyukjae and Donghae he said, "We should be more like Kyuhyun."

Kyuhyun ducked his head, a bit embarrassed. He didn't think he was being noble at all - he was just being kind to the new boy. Kyuhyun couldn't imagine what it must be like - to lose your parents and be dumped in an orphanage. It wasn't as if Kyuhyun minded living here, but it was different for him. He'd grown up here and was used to it. 

Finally, just as lunch was practically over, Zhou Mi showed up. He slipped into the seat next to Kyuhyun silently. His hair was wet, and as Kyuhyun turned to say hello, he noticed that the top of Zhou Mi's shirt was also soaked. _As if…_ Kyuhyun thought slowly, _he'd been dunked…_

"What happened?" Kyuhyun all but demanded. "Who did this?"

Zhou Mi shook his head, and he looked down at his food. "Nothing. No one."

Lya drifted over to talk to Zhou Mi's daemon, and she floated back. "It was Andy and his friends." They were a group of senior boys, many years older and much bigger than Kyuhyun - not far off 19, the age that boys left the orphanage - but that thought didn't cross his mind as he found himself storming over to their table.

"You touch him again and I'll make you regret it!" he spat at Andy, fists clenched tightly by his side. 

Andy looked him up and down and scoffed while his daemon, a serpent, flicked her tongue lazily. "Is that right?" 

Lya changed into a mongoose, leaping on to Andy's daemon, biting down on her skin and kicking at her with her back legs. They fell underneath the table, fighting wildly and Andy stood up, trying to use his size and height to intimidate Kyuhyun. "Who do you think you're talking to, huh?" 

"You hurt him, you even _look_ at him wrongly, and I'll make you regret being born," Kyuhyun repeated angrily. 

Andy let out a loud peal of laughter. "You and which army, little boy?"

"Us," came from behind Kyuhyun and he turned to see Siwon, Hyukjae, Donghae, and all their other friends that were of similar age standing there. He also noticed that Sir had entered. He cleared his throat loudly, arms crossed as he watched from the door. 

Andy's eyes flicked over to Sir, and then he shrugged casually. "Fine, we'll leave new boy alone. Get out of my face." 

"If you try anything again…" Kyuhyun said warningly, and Andy snorted, turning his back to him - an obvious dismissal. 

Kyuhyun went back to his seat, trailed by Lya, returning to sit down next to Zhou Mi, who was hunched over, as if he was trying to make himself small. 

"If anyone does anything to you again - you tell me, okay?" Kyuhyun said to him. 

"Yeah, you tell us," Siwon chimed, as did Hyukjae, a beat later. There was silence for a bit and then Siwon elbowed Donghae, sitting next to him, hard in the ribs. 

"Yeah," Donghae finally agreed.

Zhou Mi looked up, giving them all a tenuous smile. "Thanks," he said softly. 

"Eat," Kyuhyun encouraged. "There's only ten minutes left of lunch." 

 

\---

 

Later that evening, after dinner had finished and it was almost time for bed, Zhou Mi dropped his knapsack to the floor in the middle of their room. 

The others tried to disguise their curiosity, but Zhou Mi encouraged them all over, and soon he was surrounded by all of them sitting on the floor as he undid the buckles, opening it widely so they could peer inside.

There didn't seem to be much in there. There was an item of clothing - it was all folded up but Kyuhyun assumed it was a coat - which Zhou Mi lifted out and pushed aside. All the boys wore hand me downs, clothes that had been in circulation for years and years, items that were constantly patched and darned to extend their life, and it looked out of place compared to their clothing. Next Zhou Mi removed a stack of thin books, distributing them around. 

"Wow…" Hyukjae said in awe, flicking through the pages reverently. They had books in the library, but none of them were like this. They were used to pages of tiny text, but instead these ones were filled with vibrant drawings and colourful illustrations. "What are these?"

"Comics?" Zhou Mi said in surprise. "You've never seen a comic before?" 

"Nope." Donghae propped his head on Hyukjae's shoulder as they became engrossed in the images. 

But Kyuhyun was more interested in what Zhou Mi had next. He had started unwrapping a thin piece of red material, exposing a silver medallion, about half the size of his palm. It was on a thin link chain, and Zhou Mi held it up in the air. The front of the medallion was sectioned, the metal thinly etched away to create 10 segments. On each one there were small but intricate symbols that Kyuhyun didn't recognise. 

"What's that?"

It dangled in the air, twisting on its chain as Zhou Mi frowned at it. "I'm not sure. I feel like I should know…" and then he blinked furiously, as if becoming aware of himself, sneaking a look at the other boys who were still busy with the comics. "It probably belongs to my parents." Then he nodded firmly. "Yes, that's it." Even though he sounded sure, Kyuhyun had a feeling that he was trying to make up a story on the spot. "They keep telling me off for taking it, so I have to make sure I look after it until I can give it back." 

He was smiling to himself now, but Kyuhyun could see Donghae and Hyukjae share a glance - Zhou Mi capturing their attention at the mention of his parents. He talked about them as if they were still alive, and of course, if he was here, they weren't. 

It was Hyukjae who dared broach the subject. "Ummm… but…"

"But?" Zhou Mi looked at him. 

"You know your parents are gone…" Hyukjae's voice got quieter and quieter, until he was practically whispering the final words. 

At that, Zhou Mi's eyes flashed, and he stood to his full height, towering over Donghae and Hyukjae. It was easy to forget exactly how tall he was due to this thinness, but drawn up like this he was imposing - and very much unlike the boy who they knew so far. "My parents aren't dead!" he exclaimed hotly, and it was the first time any of them had ever heard him raise his voice. 

"You're here… of course they're dead…" Hyukjae said, as if in their defense. "All our parents are." 

"Well mine aren't. They're not! They're alive! I know they are!!" 

It was a delusion of course, a lie that Zhou Mi told to protect himself, but Kyuhyun couldn't find it in his heart to argue with him. He spoke up before anyone else could refute it, reaching up to place his hand on Zhou Mi's arm. "Okay, we believe you. They're coming back for you."

Donghae looked like he wanted to protest, but his words died at a sharp glare from Kyuhyun. 

All of Zhou Mi's anger left him as quickly as it had appeared and he sat back down, slumping. "They're not," he said, softly this time, and he cuddled his daemon to his chest. "They're not. I know it. They're not." 

Kyuhyun shared a glance with Donghae and Hyukjae, unsure of what to say, and it was Siwon who broke the tense atmosphere. 

"We should go to bed," he said, "Thanks for showing us your stuff." He gathered up the comics, carefully stacking them together before holding them out for Zhou Mi to take.

"Oh. You can keep those," Zhou Mi said to him. "I don't have any use for them." 

Donghae's eyes lit up. "Really?" 

Zhou Mi nodded. "Uh huh." He took them off Siwon and handed them to Donghae, who took them eagerly.

Making friends when young was easy, and Kyuhyun knew that with that one action Zhou Mi had endeared himself to Donghae. Perhaps he would be accepted into their group of friends after all. 

One of the orphanage staff stuck her head around the door. 

"It's time to get into bed, boys," she told them and they all nodded, getting to their feet so they could climb into bed. Kyuhyun watched as Zhou Mi carefully put the chain over his head, tucking the medallion away under his shirt. 

 

\---

 

In the middle of the night, Kyuhyun was again woken by up Lya, but this time by her cold nose being pressed into his chin. 

"Ugh," he groaned, throwing an arm across his eyes and doing his best to push her away. "What?"

"Zhou Mi," she said into his ear, and when Kyuhyun took the time to listen, he could hear Zhou Mi crying again. He sighed but quietly climbed out of his bunk, this time wrapping his blanket around his shoulders before he descended.

"Mi?" he whispered, giving Zhou Mi's shoulder a gentle shake. He seemed to be dreaming again. Kyuhyun shook him a bit more forcefully and Zhou Mi's eyes flew open. "It's okay, it's just a dream. Go back to sleep."

Even though it was dark in the room, Kyuhyun could see that Zhou Mi's eyes were shining with tears. "I don't know if I can now," Zhou Mi confessed in a low voice, sniffling in between each word. 

Kyuhyun nudged him to shuffle over. "Here - move over." He laid down next to him. "Do you want to talk about it?"

He could feel Zhou Mi shaking his head. "No - I can't."

"Oh. It's okay if you don't want to."

"No, no. I can't… I can't remember. What happened." 

"What do you mean?" Kyuhyun whispered back. 

"I don't remember what happened - where my parents are, where we lived, how I ended up here - why don't I remember?" Only then Kyuhyun realised that Zhou Mi wasn't talking about his nightmare.

"You don't remember anything from before the orphanage?" Kyuhyun was intrigued, despite the late hour. How was that possible? Zhou Mi had talked about his parents - he obviously remembered something. Across the room, Siwon stirred, mumbling a little as he rolled over, and Kyuhyun made an effort to lower his voice. "You don't recall where you used to live?"

Zhou Mi took another quiet sniffle. "There's gaps. I remember my parents - mostly - but before I arrived here, it's all blurry. I don't know what happened. I just remember that it was dark and cold and blue? And then someone found me. I don't even know how I got there!" He'd started crying again, doing his best to hold it in so he didn't wake the others with his sobbing. Kyuhyun could feel Lya through their bond, how concerned and worried she was, so Kyuhyun shuffled closer, turning on his side so he could put his arm around Zhou Mi to comfort him. 

"What if I did something to them?" Zhou Mi asked, burying his head into Kyuhyun's shoulder. Kyuhyun petted his back gently. 

"I'm sure you didn't," he told him. "And… maybe you'll remember in time? Maybe you're just in shock?" Kyuhyun didn't really know what he was saying, he just knew that his heart was being all squeezy. Kyuhyun had never known his parents - but at least he had all his memories of growing up at the orphanage. He'd always known who he was. 

He kept rubbing Zhou Mi's back, until the older boy calmed down a little. "It'll be okay," he promised. "Everything will be fine."

 

\---

 

The next morning, as they were on their way to breakfast, Zhou Mi tentatively grasped his wrist, keeping him behind. The others didn't notice and Kyuhyun and Zhou Mi lingered in their room as they left.

"Thanks," Zhou Mi told him, looking bashful. "Sorry." 

"It's alright," Kyuhyun replied. "That's what friends are for - right?"

Zhou Mi's cheeks pinked a little, but he gave him a small, tentative smile. "Yeah…"

Kyuhyun reached down for his hand, pulling him into the hallway. "Time for breakfast. I'm starving!"

 

\---

 

As the months wore on and Zhou Mi settled into the orphanage, he provided to be an excellent addition to the group. After getting over his initial shyness, he came out of his shell and proved to have a sunny personality. He was calm, straight forward, kind, and an easy meditator for any little disputes that popped up. In addition, he was quietly brave and encouraging, and always up for an adventure. He often became the advocate for all of Kyuhyun's silly ideas, and the two of them became very close. 

It became habit for Kyuhyun to sleep in Zhou Mi's bunk each night. On Zhou Mi's third night at the orphanage, Kyuhyun was again woken up by his nightmares. When Kyuhyun went to check on him, Zhou Mi was again bone chillingly cold. After a week of this - nightmares that were loud enough to also wake everyone else in the room - Kyuhyun started automatically going straight to Zhou Mi's bunk instead of his own. 

Anything that made the room quiet and prevented Zhou Mi from waking the others was welcome, and it just became an accepted thing in their room - though, like an unspoken pact, they never discussed it outside their walls. There wasn't anything to it anyway - Zhou Mi and Kyuhyun barely touched during the night, both sleeping on their side with their backs to one another, but for whatever reason, having Kyuhyun there seemed to keep Zhou Mi's nightmares at bay.

After Andy and his group left the orphanage, Zhou Mi even became friends with most of the older boys. While Zhou Mi was slightly different, a little bit odd in some ways - he used strange expressions in his speech sometimes - everyone seemed to attribute it to him joining the orphanage late. No one ever seemed to question it. 

Only months after he first arrived, it felt like Zhou Mi had always been there, and Kyuhyun could barely remember his life without him. 

Zhou Mi got on well with Siwon too. The two would often disappear during their free time, returning covered in sweat and dirt and occasionally bruises, and Kyuhyun later discovered that Siwon was teaching Zhou Mi how to fight. 

Kyuhyun met them, his hands on his hips, as they came back from one of these sessions.

"Why do you need to learn how to fight?" he demanded. "Are people picking on you again?" It didn't seem likely - Zhou Mi was no longer the lanky boy who'd arrived. With puberty, and Siwon's encouragement, Zhou Mi had turned into someone wiry and strong. He was still lean, but now it was made up of muscle rather than skin and bone. 

"No one's picking on me," Zhou Mi reassured him. "It's just - one day I'll leave here, and I'll need to be able to defend myself. And maybe --" he looked down at the ground, seemingly embarrassed. "Maybe I need to be able to defend other people too." 

In hindsight, perhaps Kyuhyun should've asked him who he needed to defend. But at the time, the only thing he could ask was: "Why aren't you teaching me too?"

Kyuhyun hadn't had his own growth spurt yet - being almost two years older they towered over him - but when he had his mind set on something no one was ever able to dissuade him. Siwon and Zhou Mi added him to their sessions, and soon Donghae and Hyukjae also found out and wanted to be involved. 

With everyone in the mix, they became more fun than Kyuhyun expected, despite the fact that he regularly got pummeled due to his smaller size. The only person who went easy on him was Zhou Mi, until Kyuhyun huffed at him one day, stamping his feet like a child, "Fight me properly!"

It only took a second for Zhou Mi to take him down, in a tackle that ended with Kyuhyun flat on his back. Zhou Mi straddled him, bracketing his body with his thighs, amused by how easy it had been. But Kyuhyun wasn't amused. Heat flared through him, heat and embarrassment, and he pushed at Zhou Mi, smacking him until he got up and released him. 

Kyuhyun didn't really understand why he'd reacted the way he did. After that, the sessions didn't seem quite so fun and eventually he stopped tagging along. He knew that Siwon and Zhou Mi, and occasionally Hyukjae, kept it up, but he stopped asking about it. Still, he breathed a quiet sigh of relief whenever they came back without obvious injuries. 

The year the boys turned 14, their class lessons changed from the basics - reading, writing and mathematics - to practical lessons. These lessons were an attempt to teach them skills for a trade that they might be able to use in the outside world. 

Siwon, Hyukjae, Zhou Mi and Donghae were all of a similar age, and they were put into these new classes together, leaving Kyuhyun behind. Their first lesson was on woodworking, and they met Kyuhyun at lunch afterwards. Donghae was holding two lunch trays, and Kyuhyun noticed that Zhou Mi's right hand was tightly bandaged. 

"This one," Siwon said, referring to Zhou Mi, "Somehow managed to zone out and scraped all the skin off his knuckles." 

"I didn't mean to," Zhou Mi said, a little sadly, picking idly at the bandage on his hand. "I don't know what happened." 

"Is it bad? Does it hurt?" Kyuhyun asked, oddly anxious at the thought. Donghae had been correct - way back when Zhou Mi had first arrived. Zhou Mi had become his best friend, the best friend out of all his best friends, and he still felt strangely protective about him, despite Zhou Mi being older, taller, and - by now - more than capable of looking after himself. 

"No, it's fine," Zhou Mi said to him, giving him a wry smile as Kyuhyun grabbed his hand to stop him from dislodging the bandage. "But I don't think I have a knack for this." 

Their project in class was to construct a stool from scratch. They had to measure, cut and prepare their own wood, build the stool, and paint the end result. A few weeks later, they all brought them out to show Kyuhyun. 

Siwon's was perfect - each join neatly aligned and the wood was smooth and glowing. Hyukjae's wasn't bad, and neither was Donghae's, though neither coming close to looking as good as Siwon's. 

In stark comparison, Zhou Mi's was misshaped, crooked, and discoloured. 

"It's artistic!" Zhou Mi said of his creation, before shaking his head sadly. "Guess I'm not cut out to be a carpenter." 

After that, there were other practical lessons - gardening, cooking, baking, metal work, stone work - and Zhou Mi provided to be hopeless at them all. Still, what he lacked in ability he made up for in enthusiasm, throwing himself into his lessons eagerly. The others were both supportive and amused by his efforts, though they all were surprised that anyone could be quite so bad at _everything_. 

"Well… Zhou Mi is good at being cheerful," Hyukjae shrugged, after Zhou Mi somehow managed to give Kyuhyun food poisoning from a loaf of bread that he'd baked. As Kyuhyun heaved his guts into the grass outside, he decided that, in future, he would support Zhou Mi's cheerfulness rather than his baking. 

As for the others, it was obvious that Siwon had a talent for making things with his hands. Donghae and Hyukjae didn't excel at anything in particular but were general all-rounders, managing to scrape in as just acceptable for most of their lessons. It made Kyuhyun wonder what he'd be good at. 

"You'll be good at whatever you set your mind to," Zhou Mi told him kindly, supportive of his best friend, as always. 

But as it turned out, Zhou Mi was wrong. Two years later, when Kyuhyun turned 14, he found that he was also terrible at the practical lessons - possibly even worse than Zhou Mi had been. At least Zhou Mi had enthusiasm. It got so bad that one day, Sir called him into his office.

"How would you like to start helping me instead of taking those lessons?" Sir asked him. He was seated behind his desk, stacked high with paperwork and files. 

"Help you?"

"Yes," Sir confirmed. "You're one of the smartest here - you should be using that mind of yours rather than wasting it." He was too kind to state that Kyuhyun was particularly bad at everything else and doing thinking work was his only option.

And so, instead of taking lessons, Kyuhyun started helping Sir. It began with simple clerical work - filing and copying - but over time Sir gave him more and more duties, until he was doing the orphanage's books, learning everything that was required in running the place. It was more complex than he'd initially thought. The orphanage didn't have much money - they relied on grants and donations - but Sir somehow managed to find ways of feeding and housing 100 boys on very little funds. It was a tight balancing act. 

Kyuhyun enjoyed his time with Sir, though he did feel a bit sad at being separated from his friends - yet again. In addition, as he grew older, a barrier had grown between him and those who weren't in his small friendship group. He was considered weird: too smart mostly, and while no one ever bullied him there was always a distance and coldness in the way the others interacted with him. The fact that he was specifically selected by Sir only caused that distance to grow. 

Siwon, Donghae, Hyukjae and Zhou Mi treated him as if nothing was different, as if _he_ wasn't different, so Kyuhyun tried not to pay it much mind. He had his friends, the people he could trust, and he couldn't pinpoint what the others saw that caused them to reject him anyway. 

Despite this, there were days when it did bother him. One day Zhou Mi found him up on the roof. Kyuhyun still liked climbing up there. Siwon had long stopped joining him and it had become Kyuhyun's private place.

"Are you upset?" Zhou Mi asked after he'd clambered his way up - rather ungracefully. He wasn't very coordinated at times, still getting used to his own body and long limbs. 

"No," Kyuhyun lied, staring out at the horizon as Lya flew above them. He didn't know why he bothered lying when Zhou Mi could always tell. Zhou Mi carefully shuffled closer, until they were sitting hip by hip and he could sling an arm around Kyuhyun's shoulders. 

Zhou Mi was the touchiest of all his friends, though he knew enough to dampen it unless they were in private. Secretly, Kyuhyun always liked the contact and never discouraged it. He let his head fall onto Zhou Mi's shoulder. 

"Different isn't a bad thing," Zhou Mi told him softly. Up here the wind was stronger than on the ground but Kyuhyun could still hear his words clearly. 

"It's not for you." If Zhou Mi wasn't his best friend, Kyuhyun might've been jealous that Zhou Mi was allowed to be different. But he wasn't, so there wasn't any heat in his words, just resignation. 

"It's not for you either," Zhou Mi assured him. "You could grow a horn in the middle of your forehead and it won't matter to me." The mental imagery made Kyuhyun laugh a little. 

"That's stupid, you're stupid," he told Zhou Mi, feeling better already. 

"I am!" Zhou Mi agreed cheerfully, and they sat there for a while until the wind picked up too much for it to be safe before climbing their way back inside. 

Growing up was tough for anyone, but it was easier with a friend by your side. 

 

\---

 

It was Lya who woke Kyuhyun up, with a soft, "Oh!" in his ear. 

"What is it?" he asked her sleepily, opening his eyes. He could make out the outline of Zhou Mi's back, and beyond that he could just see his daemon lying close to the wall. 

"She's settled," Lya told him. She was in fox form, her eyes bright in the darkness. 

When children were young, their daemons could take on any shape they desired. But eventually everyone's daemons settled on a form and never changed again. The timing was different for everyone, but generally it was as someone was approaching adulthood. Lya crawled into the covers, cuddling herself into Kyuhyun's chest and he wondered what Zhou Mi's daemon had settled on. 

"She's a lioness," Lya told him, sounding awed. "A golden lioness." And then, a little breathily. "She's so beautiful."

Kyuhyun wanted to see her. He lifted himself up a little so he could see over Zhou Mi's back. Sure enough, as Lya had said, next to Zhou Mi laid a lioness. Kyuhyun could make out the shape of her muzzle, close to Zhou Mi's face. She was squashed right up to the wall - there wasn't much room in the bed for a lion, Zhou Mi and Kyuhyun, and for some reason Kyuhyun had an overwhelming urge to reach over and touch her. 

It was odd because humans never touched one another's daemons - it was never explicitly stated but everyone grew up knowing that it was taboo. So for Kyuhyun to have this desire was incredibly wrong, and yet he couldn't let go of the thought. It was so strong that he clasped his hands together, shoving them underneath his body, against the mattress, so that he couldn't act upon it. 

Lya crept out of the blankets and over Zhou Mi's sleeping body. Zhou Mi's daemon was lying on her side, one paw draped over him possessively, and Lya settled herself on the lioness's back. Daemons were allowed to touch one another, and after Lya made contact the urge for Kyuhyun passed. He heaved a sigh of relief and went back to sleep. 

 

\---

 

When Kyuhyun woke up - far too early - the next morning, he realised that he had to stop sleeping in the same bed as Zhou Mi. It was still dark, with everyone still asleep, and he sidled out from under the covers, climbing up the ladder to his unused bed. Lya leapt up after him, cuddling under his arm, her fur tickling his chest. 

She felt different and he stroked down her back thoughtfully before he knew what had happened.

"You've settled," he said in surprise, finally understanding the emotion that she was sending through to him. 

"I have." She tucked her nose under his chin, all set in her final form as a red fox. 

In the morning, both Donghae and Hyukjae were also surprised - and understandably so. They were both a couple of years older than Kyuhyun but neither of their daemons had settled yet. Neither had Siwon's, and he was the oldest. 

Kyuhyun just shrugged at them as he brushed his teeth. "I dunno," he said after spitting out his toothpaste. "She just said that she felt it was time." Kyuhyun himself wasn't entirely sure why Lya had decided on a fox - foxes had a bad reputation, didn't they? At least according to the few farmers that Kyuhyun had met, who would sometimes drop by the orphanage with spare crops. He supposed they were clever though, agile and cunning.

"Wonder what mine will settle as," Hyukjae mused as he rubbed at his face with a washcloth. 

"Zhou Mi's settled last night too," Kyuhyun told them, almost forgetting. "A lioness."

"A lioness? Oh?" 

Daemons were manifestations of their inner self, and at first glance - Zhou Mi didn't seem like a lion. But when Kyuhyun put more thought into it, it became clearer - Zhou Mi may not have been a lion, but a lioness made sense. He was strong, proud, rational, and strongly protective and supportive of those he cared about. He didn't seek out glory, was never the head or leader, but he held the group together. Kyuhyun thought that it suited him quite well. 

Kyuhyun looked down at Lya, at her mischievous grinning face, and thought that perhaps she suited him too. 

 

\---

 

Time passed, and too soon the conversation amongst Kyuhyun's friends turned to discussions about what they would do when they turned 19. 

"And what are you doing?" Hyukjae asked Siwon one day, a few months before their 19th birthdays. They were born only a few days apart.

The day each boy turned 19, was the day they left, no longer the responsibility of the orphanage. Up to that point, the orphanage would have done everything they could to ensure their survival, but once they reached that magical age, they were on their own. Sir would take them to the closest village, give them a small amount of money and supplies, and send them on their way with best wishes for their future. 

Their older friends - Heechul, Gunhee, Sungmin - had already left, and Hyukjae and Siwon were next to go. Donghae wouldn't be far behind, only 6 months younger. 

"Well," Siwon told them all, "Sir gave me some names of people I could talk to about a job. There's a carpenter in the village - and another in the next town over. i'm hoping to gain an apprenticeship." 

Zhou Mi had his head resting on his elbow as he stared out the window, his daemon spread out on her side at his feet.

"What about you, Mi?" Donghae asked and Zhou Mi jerked up, roused from whatever daydream he'd been having. He had a tendency to do that - get lost in his own head, needing to be brought back to wherever he'd drifted off to. 

Kyuhyun realised with Donghae's question that if Hyukjae and Siwon were leaving soon - so was Zhou Mi. He was only a couple of weeks younger than them. Why hadn't he thought of this before? His chest felt tight. 

"Have you ever been across those mountains?" Zhou Mi asked them all, pointing towards the mountain range they could see in the distance. Everyone shook their heads. They had all grown up in the orphanage, had never been anywhere - many of the boys had never even visited the closest town, a couple of hours away, much less stepped foot on the mountains that were so far they were only faintly visible on the horizon. 

"There's a huge ocean past those mountains. I saw it on the map," Zhou Mi said, almost dreamily, "I'm going to find it." 

In the years that Zhou Mi had been in the orphanage, he'd given up on the delusion that his parents were still alive. After that though, he became obsessed with the sea - something that none of them had ever seen. The orphanage was located far inland, months away from the closest ocean. 

The bell rang, signaling the hour for chores. Zhou Mi and Kyuhyun headed down the basement together, on laundry duty for the week. 

"Are you really going over the mountains?' Kyuhyun asked as they walked through the narrow hallway, their arms brushing as they walked. Lya and Zhou Mi's daemon were ahead of them, playfully swiping at one another and racing one another down the corridor. _What about me?_ Kyuhyun wanted to ask. 

Not that he needed to. They'd discovered over the years that they were well attuned to one another, practically knowing what the other was thinking. Their friendship wasn't something they needed to talk about, just one of those things that just was, but it was obvious to everyone that they were closer to each other than to anyone else. 

"I'm not going to forget you!" Zhou Mi told him, linking his arm into Kyuhyun's. "I'll come back for you - I promise." 

"But…" It was almost two full years until Kyuhyun turned 19. Kyuhyun believed that Zhou Mi was being sincere - but who knew what would happen in two years. 

"I can't stay here," Zhou Mi told him, gently, as they rounded the corner and into the laundry, being hit by a wave of wet air as they entered. "There's no place for me." 

"But you could stay in the village? Until I'm 19?" 

Zhou Mi gave him a nudge with his shoulder. "What would I do there?" Then he relented. "Don't worry - I won't forget you. I promise." 

It was going to be weird without him, without the others as well. In 7 months it would just be Kyuhyun. He could feel himself frowning as they started to fold the dry clothing, sorting it into piles according to size. 

"The time will pass so quickly you won't even notice I'm gone!" Zhou Mi told him confidently. From the floor, Zhou Mi's daemon let out a huge yawn, placing a massive paw on Lya and dragging her close until the fox was settled beneath her chest.

Kyuhyun doubted that very much.

 

\----

 

The night before Zhou Mi's 19th birthday, Kyuhyun crept into his bed, just as he used to do when they were younger. Zhou Mi hadn't fallen asleep yet, and he turned over, throwing his arm around Kyuhyun. Lya crept over both of them to nuzzle at Zhou Mi's daemon. 

"I'm going to miss you," Kyuhyun confessed into the darkness. Siwon and Hyukjae had left a couple of weeks ago, and Kyuhyun was still trying to get used to how much quieter the room was. 

"I'll miss you too," Zhou Mi whispered back. His arm tightened around him and he sighed into Kyuhyun's hair before letting go. Zhou Mi sat up a little, reaching into his shirt to pull out the medallion. He pulled it over his head and then awkwardly placed it around Kyuhyun's neck. 

"Are you sure?" Kyuhyun asked as Zhou Mi laid back down next to him. It was Zhou Mi's most treasured possession and it felt heavy against Kyuhyun's chest, not just due to its physical weight. Kyuhyun could feel tears prickling, tears that he did his best to ignore.

"Yeah." Even though it was dark, Kyuhyun could imagine the fond smile that Zhou Mi had on his face. "Look after it for me." 

Kyuhyun wasn't stupid. Everyone always told him that he was one of the smartest boys in the orphanage, and it wasn't arrogance for him to know that it was true. So it hadn't taken him long to figure out why Lya had settled so early. She settled the moment he realised that he loved Zhou Mi. He _loved_ Zhou Mi, in a way that he wasn't meant to, in the way that was wrong. Somehow all the others had seen it in him before he could. 

And now Zhou Mi was leaving and he couldn't tell him. 

"Hey, don't cry," Zhou Mi said to him as he sniffled, unable to stop the tears from falling. "It's okay, everything will be okay." 

Kyuhyun couldn't help it, hating that he was too much of a coward to tell him. That he pretended that he was just going to miss him. 

Zhou Mi wiped Kyuhyun's face with his free hand. "I'll be back for you, I promise, I promise." He placed a soft kiss on Kyuhyun's forehead. "You're my best friend, I won't forget you."

"That's not it," Kyuhyun said shakily. He wasn't worried that Zhou Mi would forget him, he was upset because Zhou Mi was leaving and he couldn't muster up the courage to tell him that he loved him. He clutched at his friend helplessly, at that moment feeling so young, useless - so immature. He could feel Lya's concern through their bond. Concern and encouragement. 

Kyuhyun tilted his head up, searching for Zhou Mi's face.

"What is it?" 

Kyuhyun pressed his lips together tightly. He _couldn't_. "Nothing," he finally said. "I'm just really going to miss you."

 

\----

 

Zhou Mi was wrong and Kyuhyun was right. 

The time didn't pass quickly. 

With everyone gone, Kyuhyun was lonely, lonelier than he'd ever been in his life. While he was friendly with some of the younger boys, it wasn't the same and he spent many hours wondering how his friends were doing in the real world.

Kyuhyun received letters from Siwon, written in his large, careful writing. Siwon had been successful in gaining an apprenticeship to a master carpenter in a town about a day's travel away. The letters were regular at first, but as time went on the time between them grew larger and larger, until eventually they stopped coming. 

Hyukjae wrote too, giving Kyuhyun news of himself and Donghae. They'd both been taken on as farmhands not far from the orphanage, and according to Hyukjae, Donghae had a large, very obvious, crush on one of the farmer's daughters. 

But of Zhou Mi, the person he most wanted to hear from - Kyuhyun didn't receive any news. It was as if he'd disappeared. When Kyuhyun wrote back to the others, asking if they knew where he was, their response was negative. Eventually, desperate for information, Kyuhyun even asked Sir, to no success.

Had Zhou Mi forgotten him? 

"Maybe he's just busy," Lya said, doing her best to comfort Kyuhyun, though she wasn't particularly convincing.

She was lonely too. 

But what could they do? All they could do was wait. 

 

\---

 

When Kyuhyun's 19th birthday finally arrived, Lya couldn't contain her excitement. She leapt around the dorm, jumping from one bunk to another, then running in circles around him as he packed the meager possessions he would be taking with him. 

Kyuhyun tucked the medallion that Zhou Mi had given him safely inside his shirt. It was cool against his bare skin, by now a comforting feeling. 

As he had done every day since he'd left, Kyuhyun wondered where Zhou Mi had gone. Was he okay? Was he healthy? Happy? 

Had he met someone?

"Let's go! Sir is waiting!" Lya said, her tail swishing to and fro and she ran back and forth. Kyuhyun wasn't quite as eager, walking slowly through the corridors to the main entrance. He was conflicted. A part of him was excited, like Lya, to begin his new life, but another part of him wanted him to slow down, to imprint the place in his mind so he wouldn't ever forget it. 

Sir was outside by the wagon. It was wooden, four wheeled, and small and light enough to be drawn by one horse. Sir was gently stroking the horse's muzzle as Kyuhyun approached - a sturdy gelding that had been around for almost as long as Kyuhyun could remember. Sir gave Kyuhyun a big smile when he saw him. 

"Ready to go?" Sir's eagle daemon tilted her head and appraised him as Kyuhyun nodded.

"I'm ready." 

Sir tried to make conversation as the horse trotted along, pulling the wagon behind it. Kyuhyun did his best to keep up, but mostly he was distracted by the scenery. He'd never been this far from the orphanage - not in his memory anyway - and it was all new and exciting. They travelled past farms and fields of crops: corn, wheat, cabbages. There were paddocks with herds of cattle or flocks of black faced sheep. There was the occasional stone cottage, and solitary horses who looked up and whickered as they came past. They hardly saw any people. 

It took several hours until they arrived at the closest village. It was only small, with one main street, and Sir stopped the wagon on its outskirts. 

"This is where we stop," Sir told him, carefully stepping down from the wagon and helping Kyuhyun to follow suit. He secured the horse and then knocked on the door of the building they were in front of. 

"You'll stay here for a few nights - until you get settled," Sir told him. They were at an inn, double storied and made of brick, with small wonky windows and a chimney that looked as it was about to fall over. As they waited for the door to be opened, Sir pulled a small leather pouch from his pocket, placing it into Kyuhyun's palm. "That's to get you started." 

"Do all the boys stay here?" Kyuhyun asked after he'd thanked him for the money, the coins jiggling as he tucked it away securely.

Sir nodded as the door opened. 

They were welcomed by a young woman. "Ahh, hello," she said, giving them a bright smile. She leant up to give Sir a kiss on the cheek before ushering them both inside. She was petite, her face kind and eyes sparkling, with her hair cut above her shoulders. She had a little terrier dog daemon by her side. "I'm Sunyoung, you must be Kyuhyun." 

They followed Sunyoung into the main room, Sir ducking his head a little through the small doorway, and as they entered they were greeted by a chorus. 

"Surprise!" 

Kyuhyun jumped a little but then brightened as he recognised the people yelling at him - Siwon, Hyukjae and Donghae. They ran up to him, pounding him on the back and pulling him into a group hug. 

"Happy birthday!"

"You're finally 19!"

"We've missed you!"

Lya was busy with their daemons, and Kyuhyun felt a bubble of happiness at seeing them all. It had been so long. They all looked good and so much more mature than when they'd left. Siwon was somehow broader, maybe even slightly taller, and although Donghae and Hyukjae didn't appear to have grown any, they both looked tanned and fit. 

After everyone had calmed down a little (and Kyuhyun had quietly wiped away some of the tears that had gathered in his eyes) Sir drew Kyuhyun aside. "It's time for me to go," he told him, looking down at him proudly. 

Kyuhyun realised that he'd probably never see Sir again - the man who was the closest thing to a father he'd ever had, and suddenly it hit him - this was it. He was on his own from now on. He gave in to the urge to give the older man a hug, and Sir wrapped his arms around him, returning it tightly. 

"Thank you. For everything."

"I hope that you'll be happy and successful. You turned out well and I'm very proud of you." Sir's daemon flapped down to Lya, giving her a gentle peck on the head, preening one of her ears in her beak, before flying back to Sir's shoulder. 

After Sir left, Kyuhyun's friends pulled him over to the corner. The inn was a small one, consisting of a main hall, where they were currently located, a kitchen, a stable, and bedchambers on the second floor. The floor of the hall was made of tightly packed dirt, covered with clean rushes and a scattering of flowers. 

At the benches in the corner of the room, kyuhyun's friends had a cake for him, obviously remembering Kyuhyun's predilection for sweet things. Sunyoung dropped off plates and a knife, and everyone sang Kyuhyun an off-key birthday song. As they ate, they caught up Kyuhyun up on their lives since leaving the orphanage. 

Birthdays back in the orphanage were always low-key affairs, and this was the biggest celebration that Kyuhyun had ever had. Surrounded by his friends, Kyuhyun felt incredibly warm and happy that they'd all taken the time to be there. 

The only thing that was a little dent in his happiness, was the question of where Zhou Mi was. Why wasn't he here?

Hyukjae swallowed his last bite before answering for both him and Donghae, "Dunno. We haven't heard from him. Wonnie? He'd be more likely to contact you."

But Siwon shook his head too. "Not since he left the orphanage. You haven't heard from him, Kyu? I thought… out of all of us…" 

That anxiety that always came up whenever Kyuhyun thought about Zhou Mi bubbled away quietly. Zhou Mi's medallion sat heavy and cold against his chest - it never seemed to warm up, no matter the temperature. "I haven't heard from him either…" 

"Oh." There was a flash of disappointment across Siwon's face, and then he quickly changed the subject in an obvious attempt to distract him. They grilled Kyuhyun on his plans even though he hadn't completely decided on what he would do next. He knew that he could stay at the inn for a few days, and Sir had given him a couple of contacts to ask about jobs, but he felt stuck and unable to make a decision until he knew what had happened to Zhou Mi.

After a few hours, Hyukjae stood up, looking apologetic. "Sorry Kyu, we have to head back to the farm." Donghae reached across to pull Kyuhyun into a hug.

"It was so good to see you," Donghae told him. "We'll stay in touch, okay? Write to us and let us know where you go - we'll try and visit you again soon."

"I have to leave too," Siwon agreed, straightening his clothes as he waited for Donghae to release Kyuhyun so he could also have a hug. "You know where I am - let me know if you need anything. And if you hear from Zhou Mi, scold him for all of us!"

"Yeah, we miss that jerk," Hyukjae chimed in. 

After his friends left, Sunyoung showed Kyuhyun to his room. There were three bedchambers upstairs on the second floor, up a rickety set of steps. The room was small but clean, with a single bed covered with a patchwork blanket and a small wooden desk. 

"Home sweet home," she told him, and Kyuhyun placed his small bag on a stool in the corner and sat on the bed, Lya jumping up to join him. Sunyoung gave him a last set of instructions before leaving him alone. "Dinner is served at 6.30pm. Breakfast at 7am. There's a washroom down the hall - I bring up fresh water each morning. Oh and - happy birthday." 

Kyuhyun flopped backwards onto the bed. The mattress was thin but more comfortable than his one back at the orphanage. Despite that, he found himself missing it - the familiarity of those thick stone walls, the staff, his friends. It had been good to see them today. Kyuhyun was again touched that they'd all made the effort to be there - with the exception of Zhou Mi. 

Where was he?

"All the boys come here after turning 19, right?" Lya asked him, and he agreed. "So…" she hinted, "Maybe Sunyoung remembers Zhou Mi."

She was right of course, and he came to his senses, leaping off the bed. His footsteps clattered on the wooden floor as he raced downstairs to find Sunyoung.

She was in the kitchen, an apron tied around her waist and a wooden spoon in her hand as she tended to a pot. "Hello - do you need something?"

Kyuhyun felt a bit embarrassed at the way he'd suddenly burst into the room. "No, I just - I - ahhh… I was just wondering if you need some help?"

"Oh! Well…" she gestured him towards a few potatoes sitting on the bench near her. "You could peel those?" 

Kyuhyun found a knife and got to work, holding a potato securely in his palm as he used the blade to scrape off the skin. As he started peeling, he asked her, "Do you remember someone who would've stayed here a couple of years ago? Zhou Mi? Tall, smiles a lot, kind of goofy?"

"Zhou Mi? Of course," she replied, placing down her spoon and putting a lid on the pot she had been tending before lighting the fire underneath it. She wiped her hands on a towel and walked over to him. "Of course I remember him. Strange case that. It was good to see that he grew up well - that what happened to him didn't affect him too negatively."

This was a surprise to Kyuhyun. "You knew him? Before?" 

"Well I saw him as a child, of course, everyone in the village did. Before he was taken to your orphanage." Sunyoung inspected his work, nodding in approval. All the boys spent time in the orphanage kitchen doing chores, and Kyuhyun was an expert at peeling potatoes, having peeled crates and crates of them in his time. 

"What do you mean by before? What happened?" Zhou Mi never talked about his time before the orphanage - Kyuhyun wasn't too sure he even remembered it. After Kyuhyun finished peeling the last potato, tossing it into a bucket of water with the others, Sunyoung ushered him out into the hall, where they took a seat by the fireplace. It wasn't that cold outside and the fireplace remained unlit. 

"I was just a teenager at the time. I remember it very clearly because it was such a curious case," she began, and Kyuhyun did his best not to show his impatience. "It was my grandfather who found him in the forest - soaking wet, despite the fact that it hadn't rained for days and he was nowhere near water. It was a good thing that he found him too, Zhou Mi probably wouldn't have survived much longer out there all alone." 

"Where was he?"

"Oh, in the forest - I don't know how much geography you learnt? It's about half a day from here. It was so odd, because Zhou Mi was fully dressed - and soaked, as I'd said - and completely disoriented, poor lad. Grandpa said that he wasn't able to tell him much - where he came from, where his parents were, or even _who_ they were. All he had on him was his knapsack. No food or camping supplies. I have no idea how he survived out there." She shook her head sadly, "Unfortunately my family couldn't afford to raise another child - that's why he was taken to the orphanage. I always did wonder how he went, so it was nice to see that he grew up okay." 

Kyuhyun's head was a bit confused from her incessant talking, and yet he didn't want to seem ungrateful, not when she kept throwing him little nuggets of information. "So no one ever found out where he came from?"

"No," she confirmed. 

"Do you know where Zhou Mi went after he left here?" 

She thought for a moment, lifting her hand to her mouth in thought. "It was a while ago now… he might've mentioned something about going west?"

"West?" Kyuhyun had been expecting her to say that he'd gone north - towards the mountains and the ocean. Zhou Mi had never mentioned wanting to travel west before. 

But Sunyoung wasn't positive. "I'm sorry, I really can't remember now." She stood up, telling him, "I should finish making dinner and light the fire for the evening. Don't forget that dinner is at 6.30!" 

 

\---

 

"What do you think?' Kyuhyun asked Lya that night as they laid in bed. It felt strange to be in this room, and the flimsy curtain let in the light from the almost full moon. Lya was half on the bed, half on Kyuhyun's chest, her head on her paws. "Should we go or stay here? What if we leave and Zhou Mi comes back to find us?" 

"I think he'd be here if he could be," she told him. "Let's think about it more tomorrow," Lya suggested, practical as always. "Laying here worrying about it isn't going to help." 

"You're right," Kyuhyun conceded as he closed his eyes, and Lya snorted, a little puff of air hitting his chin.

"I'm always right."

 

\--- 

 

Kyuhyun stood in the washroom in his undershirt and boxers, sleepily brushing his teeth. That morning he'd come across one of the other occupants of the inn, a weather worn man that Kyuhyun was able to identify as a merchant by his clothing and his magpie daemon. He gave him a drowsy greeting as they passed in the hallway.

It was only after he'd splashed cold water on his face, waking him up a little, that Kyuhyun realised he should talk to the merchant. No doubt he'd have information about the wider world. Back in his room, Kyuhyun hurriedly dressed and ran a comb through his unruly hair, before racing down the steps to the main room.

The merchant was at a table closest to the front door, a large mug in his hands, and a bowl of hot porridge on the table in front of him. 

"Morning," Kyuhyun said, "Can I sit here?" he asked, and the merchant nodded graciously. Kyuhyun sat in the seat across from him and Sunyoung entered, giving Kyuhyun his own bowl and a mug full of a dark brown liquid that Kyuhyun sniffed curiously.

The merchant seemed amused at his reaction. "You don't know what coffee is, lad?" 

"Coffee?' Kyuhyun knew of the beverage from books, but they'd never served it at the orphanage. They drank water and weak tea, and sometimes during the winter - if the orange trees in the gardens fruited - watered down juice. "Of course I know what coffee is."

"You're from the orphanage, aren't you?" the merchant asked, not taking offense to the defensiveness in his tone. "You boys all look the same when you arrive here - eager, wide eyed, naive." He clicked his tongue, taking a big swallow of his coffee. "They do the best they can for you, I suppose." 

"Where're you from?" Kyuhyun asked as he blew on his spoon, trying to cool it down. 

"Ahhhh. Well, from a place that's a long way away from here. You know much of the world?" He didn't wait for a response, continuing, "Suppose there's not much use for geography when you're an orphan. My home is further than you can imagine. It's been a long time since I was there - probably since before you even existed. I just stick to this region now, makes it easier. I'm too old to travel too far now. Can't go home in any case."

"And you're a merchant? What do you sell?" Kyuhyun asked.

"Spices. Material. Whatever I can get my hands on really." The merchant eyed him across the table. "You got an education at that orphanage of yours - right? Sunyoung mentioned something about you being good with numbers. You didn't learn a trade?"

Kyuhyun shook his head slowly. "I wasn't any good at any of that. But yeah, I'm good with numbers. I used to help Sir - he runs the orphanage - with the bookkeeping and stuff."

The merchant hummed in thought. "Ever wanted to travel? I could use an assistant. I'm no good with numbers - could use someone to help me out with that." His magpie daemon watched Kyuhyun with his bright beady eyes.

"Oh… well…" Kyuhyun wondered if he should take the merchant up on his offer. But what if Zhou Mi came back for him? "Can I - can I think about it?"

The merchant gave an easy shrug. "Course you can, lad. I leave in a couple of days. You have until then to make up your mind. Heading into the village square today to sell some of my stock - you're welcome to come too."

Kyuhyun supposed there wasn't much harm in tagging along with the merchant - it wasn't as if he had made any other plans for the day, so he agreed, doing his best to quickly finish his breakfast. He chugged down his coffee, cringing a little at the bitterness, almost burning his tongue on the porridge.

The merchant had a little hand drawn cart on two wheels, and by the time Kyuhyun was ready to leave the merchant was waiting out the front of the inn, his cart loaded and covered. They walked their way to the village square, along the uneven dirt roads, and the merchant kept up a steady stream of conversation, telling Kyuhyun more about himself. Kyuhyun was fascinated - the merchant seemed to have led such an interesting life. He'd been to so many different places that Kyuhyun felt impossibly naive and isolated. At the same time, it also sounded like a difficult life. Travel between towns could be dangerous, particularly when traveling alone, as there was always the risk of bandits and other unsavoury characters.

They heard the noise of the village square before they saw it - a clamor of voices rising into the morning air. Every village had a square - a heart in the middle where people gathered to sell their wares, or to socialise. It was still early but already there were numerous tents and stalls set up, with the vendors already crying out to passersby to encourage purchases. 

The merchant found an empty spot to set up his cart, and began to unhook the cover, pulling it aside and folding it up neatly. He took a thick cloth out and spread it on the ground in front of them, before neatly arranging his goods on top. He had packets of spices, small bolts of cloth, and some furs. 

While he did that, Kyuhyun took the opportunity to take a walk through the square, Lya trotting by his side, her nose twitching with interest. He'd never experienced anything like it before, the noise, the smells, and all the different people.

If Kyuhyun went with the merchant - this could be his life. "Should we do it, Lya?" he asked his daemon. "Should we go with him?"

"It's your choice," she told him. "But what about Zhou Mi?"

Well. There was that. "What if he doesn't come back? I mean - he would've remembered my birthday, right? Why isn't he here?" Doubt had been taking seed in his heart since the night, sending out tendrils and growing stronger. "Am I meant to just wait for him forever?" 

_Yes_ , a part of him answered firmly to that question, but he pushed it away. He couldn't put his life on hold for his friend - could he? 

Kyuhyun, deep in his thoughts, hadn't realised that he'd stopped walking until a seller called out to him. 

"Hey lad! I've got something that will wipe that frown off your face! Come!" The seller had a tray in front of him, loaded with piles of round pastries, gleaming with a sticky substance. Kyuhyun came closer, and the seller asked him, "Have you had one of my honeycakes before? No?" The seller shook his head sadly, frowning like he was genuinely sad for Kyuhyun. "Ahh, you haven't lived. In that case, I'll make you a special deal. 1 copper for one - just for you. They're still warm. I tell you, there's nothing like them!" 

The cakes did look good. Kyuhyun dug into the pouch of money that Sir had given him, handing over a copper, and received a honeycake in return, wrapped in a square of brown paper and still warm to the touch. As he bit into it, honey oozed down the sides of his fingers, and sweetness exploded on his tongue. He'd never eaten anything so delicious before in his life. The seller watched in satisfaction, judging by his expression and moans that he was enjoying it. Kyuhyun finished it off, licking his fingers clean, before giving him a thumbs up. 

After that he headed back to find the merchant.

"Have a nice walk?" the merchant asked. 

"Yes!"" Kyuhyun replied, telling him about the things he'd seen and then excitedly describing the honeycake and how sweet and delicious it had been. Then he realised his mistake and felt guilty. "Sorry! I should've bought one back for you." 

The merchant laughed, his voice low and rich. "Oh lad, I've eaten plenty of honeycakes, and I can tell you the ones in this village are poor compared to other ones I've eaten."

"Really??" Kyuhyun couldn't understand how anything could possibly be more delicious, but the merchant seemed sure. 

"You have a lot to learn and a lot to experience," the merchant told him, but kindly. "Go and do some more exploring," he suggested. "It will be quiet here for a little bit - things will pick up later."

Kyuhyun did as he suggested, heading off to do more investigating. He was tempted to try more food, but found his attention drawn by a tiny tent situated at the far end of the square, away from the rest of the stalls. It was made with heavy looking material, coloured a brilliant vermillion, and looked to be barely large enough for two people to sit inside. One side of the curtain was held open, and Kyuhyun peered in curiously as he neared.

"Hello!" a voice came from within. "Come in!" It was dark inside, but Kyuhyun caught the scent of a sweet incense, spicy and woody. 

He supposed this was the tent of a fortune teller. He'd heard and read about them before, but had never seen one in person, and he was intrigued. He ducked his head inside, and as his eyes adjusted to the dim, he found a lady sitting in front of a small wooden table. On the table sat a candle, a small metal dish, a stack of cards, and on her shoulder was a large crow, its beady eyes shining. 

The lady was petite, and he couldn't judge how old - or young - she was. She had on a simple dress, with her long dark hair flowing over her shoulders. She smiled at him, encouraging him to sit on the stool. He wasn't sure if he wanted to but Lya trotted inside, settling underneath it, and that made his mind up for him. 

As he sat, the fortune teller flicked her wrist and the fabric curtain fell shut behind him. 

"Would you like your fortune read?" she asked.

"I'm not sure…" Kyuhyun replied. They were a practical bunch at the orphanage and although some of the boys pretended to mess about with magic and the occult, most of them steered well clear of it. He was also mindful of the fact that he didn't have very much money - not enough to waste on a fraud. 

She seemed to understand the reason behind his hesitation, saying, "Tell you what. I'll give you half a reading - and then you can decide if you'd like a full one." 

That seemed like a fair compromise to Kyuhyun, and when he agreed she pulled a thin black candle from underneath the table, handing it to him. "Light it," she instructed. Kyuhyun held the wick to the flame of the candle on the table as she picked up her deck of cards, giving them a quick shuffle before fanning them out. 

"Select a card."

Kyuhyun picked one, pulling it out from the deck and laying it on the table. The card had an image of a tall thin tower on top of a mountain. She took the candle he was holding from him and frowned, her brow furrowed, and then she picked up the card, holding it to the flame. The corner caught easily, burning steadily as she held the card above the candle, eventually letting it drop into the metal dish on the table. It burned until eventually it crumbled, leaving little smouldering embers and ash behind. She bit down on her lip, and Kyuhyun had the feeling that there was something she didn't want to tell him.

"What is it? What does it mean?"

"The tower signifies destruction - an ending. It's a warning."

"A warning? About what?" Uneasiness was starting to crawl slowly down his spine. 

"Can I have your hand?" she asked. He placed it on the table, palm up, and she reached over to grasp it. As soon as she made contact though, she jerked, pulling her hand away. "Oh! I can't… what's that you have? Under your shirt?" 

Kyuhyun wondered how she could possibly know about the medallion - it was completely hidden away, and not even the chain could be seen. "Nothing," he lied. She sucked her cheeks in, waiting and obviously not believing him, and finally he gave in, pulling it out of his shirt.

Her crow daemon jumped off her shoulder, onto the table, peering at the medallion closely before giving it a peck with his beak. Satisfied, he returned to her shoulder. "Can you take that off?" she asked. 

Kyuhyun did as she requested, pulling it over his head but keeping it clasped in his hand. She tsked at him impatiently. "Put it on the table." 

Kyuhyun did so reluctantly, and when he did she grasped his hand, turning it so his palm was facing upwards. She traced the lines with a finger, frowning and then she gestured to the medallion sitting on the table. "May I?" At his hesitant nod she picked it up, her other hand still gripping Kyuhyun's tightly. She clicked her tongue. "He doesn't belong here. Everything is..." she exhaled deeply. "Wrong." 

 

Kyuhyun told himself that she was just making stuff up, but he was feeling increasingly creeped out and the fingers of uneasiness were getting stronger and stronger. 

"Do you believe in fate?" she suddenly asked as she came to the end of one of the lines on his palm. 

"Fate? I… no?"

"Those of us who believe in fate, believe that everything is connected. Pull a thread here, and another somewhere else tightens. Cut a thread there, and another becomes loose. Add a thread where there wasn't one before - it destroys the whole tapestry. It's simply not allowed."

Kyuhyun didn't understand, and he didn't want to understand. While he told himself that she was just making things up to get money from him, her words were ominous. Kyuhyun didn't want to hear any more, now truly convinced that she was a fraud. He snatched the medallion back from her. "I think I've heard enough. Thanks." 

"Kyuhyun, wait." She held tightly to his wrist, nails digging into his skin. "There's a balance to all things. You've unknowingly upset that balance. You need to --" 

Kyuhyun didn't let her finish, tearing his arm free and reaching into his pocket to pull out a few coins. He tossed them on the table and hurried out. Even though he reassured himself that was just a fake, he still felt unnerved by the experience. 

He was so unnerved that he didn't ask himself how she knew his name. 

 

\---

 

Two days later, Kyuhyun had managed to make himself forget about the fortune teller. He'd also made a decision. He was going to leave with the merchant.

The merchant was worldly but kind, amused at all the things that Kyuhyun didn't know and yet he was willing to teach him. If he went with him - Kyuhyun would have a life. If he stayed - who knew what he would do in this village. There wasn't any work here for him. He'd made a couple of enquiries, contacted the people that Sir had suggested, but currently no one needed Kyuhyun's skills.

"I know what you're going to say," Kyuhyun told Lya after he'd made his decision. They were in their room, with Kyuhyun deciding that he would let the merchant know in the morning that he'd be taking up his offer. 

"No you don't," Lya huffed, all curled up in a ball on top of the bedcovers, her tail covering her muzzle. 

"There's no guarantee that he's coming back."

"But Shi said she would." 

"Shi?"

"Zhou Mi's daemon. She promised that they'd come back for us." 

"Well Zhou Mi promised too - and he's not here, is he?" Lya grumbled a little, muttering under her breath, and Kyuhyun stroked his hand down her back consolingly. "Look - we'll leave a note with Sunyoung, so if he does show up, at least he'll know where to start looking. Okay?" 

Lya wasn't okay with it, not really, but as she'd said before - it was his decision. 

 

\---

 

Sunyoung placed Kyuhyun's bowl of porridge and a mug of coffee in front of him. "You're really leaving today, huh?"

Kyuhyun nodded, taking a slow sip of the liquid. He'd gotten used to coffee during his time at the inn and was even starting to enjoy it. "Yep. Is the merchant outside?" He'd made the decision that he would be going with him, but he hadn't yet seen the merchant to let him know. 

"Yes, he's packing up," Sunyoung confirmed. She slid into the seat across from Kyuhyun, her own mug cupped in her hands. "It's been nice getting to know you, Kyuhyun. I hope to see you again sometime." 

"Thank you. For everything." Kyuhyun put down his spoon and reached into the pocket of his shirt. "If Zhou Mi comes back - do you think you can give this to him?" 

She took the letter from him, nodding. "Of course." She eyed the envelope for a moment before speaking again. "I thought you'd try to follow him."

"I can't. I don't even know where he is." Kyuhyun had contemplated trying to find him, but where was he meant to start? He didn't have much money, only the funds that Sir had given him, and what would he do once that ran out? He wasn't like Siwon, who was able to make things, or like Donghae and Hyukjae, who were good at doing any type of odd job. He'd be going on a wild goose chase, without any guarantee of success, probably ending up adrift and penniless. At least with the merchant he'd have a life, someone to guide him. 

Kyuhyun finished his breakfast with Sunyoung sitting there, the two of them in a comfortable silence. She'd been very kind to him during his time there, and no doubt she was the same to all the orphanage boys. He tried to thank her but she waved it away, as if it was nothing. 

"You boys," she said, slightly exasperated but fond, "Are so grateful for the smallest of things." 

Kyuhyun didn't comment at that, going back to his breakfast, but it made him think that Zhou Mi had taught him that. To be thankful for the small things. He sighed again, thinking of his friend, before he forced himself to stop. 

Once he finished eating it was time to leave. Kyuhyun had packed his belongings already - it hadn't taken long as they were meager at best - and he hoisted his bag over his shoulder and walked outside with Sunyoung to find the merchant. 

The merchant was out the front, leaning on his wagon, waiting. The wagon was already hitched to his horse - a sturdy off-white mare - and he appeared ready to leave. 

"You coming with me, lad?" the merchant called out. 

Kyuhyun was about to answer positively when the medallion suddenly heated up, feeling so hot that he gasped, ripping open his shirt so he could yank it away from his skin. The merchant's eyes narrowed when he saw it. 

"Ahhh… lad…" the merchant said, stepping towards him so he could take a closer look. "Where did you get this from?"

"A friend gave it to me," Kyuhyun stuttered, his free hand coming up to rub the stinging flesh that the medallion had been resting on. He was sure it had been hot enough to blister the skin but it felt smooth underneath his fingertips. 

The merchant eyed him, almost suspiciously, before his face cleared. "I never thought I'd see --- can I?" he gestured to it, and Kyuhyun lifted the chain up and over his head so he could hand it over. 

The merchant was careful not to touch the medallion itself, letting it swing on its chain as he held it up to eye level. His magpie daemon perched on his arm, inspecting it closely at the same time. "Interesting."

"What is it? It is valuable?" 

The merchant seemed lost in thought, his voice far away as he replied, "No. It's just a symbol. But you should keep it safe until you see your friend again." He carefully passed it back to Kyuhyun, watching as Kyuhyun placed it back around his neck. "This is where we leave one another. It's been nice getting to know you." 

"But --" Kyuhyun cried, confused, and the merchant patted him on the shoulder. 

"Some paths meet and some paths diverge, and we're on the latter one," he said. "Stay safe, lad. It's a big world out there, larger than you can even imagine."

 

\---

 

Kyuhyun watched the merchant leave without him. His disappointment and confusion was palpable, so strong he could almost taste it. Sunyoung had gone back inside the inn a while ago, leaving him alone with his thoughts.

It was a sunny day, the air still and hazy, and all too soon the merchant's wagon disappeared from view. 

Why? Why had he changed his mind? Kyuhyun rubbed at the spot on his chest, jostling the medallion as he did so. It was cold again, as it normally was.

"Stupid thing," Kyuhyun muttered, half tempted to take it off and throw it away. Except, while the merchant had said it wasn't valuable, his reaction told a different story and he'd told him to keep it safe. Kyuhyun reached inside his shirt, wrapping his fingers around the medallion, thinking about the merchant's words. 

Oddly, it felt as if the metal was heating up in his hands. _Look_ , an instruction floated out of nowhere and Kyuhyun found himself obeying it, focussing on the horizon where the road that lead out of the village disappeared into nothing. 

_Wait._

Kyuhyun squinted into the haze, watching as a figure appeared. As they came closer Kyuhyun made out two horses being led behind. _It couldn't be_. Kyuhyun's heart pounded, until he was 100% sure of what he was seeing and then he started running, Lya racing ahead of him. He recognised that man and that daemon. 

Lya was faster than Kyuhyun, leaping on top of the lioness when she reached them. They went down, tumbling along the dusty road. 

"Kyu!" Zhou Mi ran to meet him, dropping the leads of his horses, catching him around the waist and swinging him around before depositing him on the ground. His eyes were bright as he looked Kyuhyun over. "You grew! You're almost as tall as me now." He was dusty, boots covered in mud, and wearing a horrible brown hat, but his smile was wide and bright, and to Kyuhyun's eyes he looked amazing. 

Kyuhyun didn't know whether to hug him or punch him, but he settled for a brief tight hug and then punched Zhou Mi in the arm. "Where have you been?" 

"Hey! Ow!" Zhou Mi rubbed at his arm, pouting, and Kyuhyun pulled him into another hug. Zhou Mi looked different - he'd lost all his puppy fat from his face, and it was more angular and striking than before. He was still lean, but more tightly muscled, and Kyuhyun thought that the past two years had done him well. His eyes were the same though, warm and brown, sparkling with affection, and so was his smile. 

"I missed you," Kyuhyun mumbled into his shoulder. 

"I missed you too. I'm so so sorry that I'm late. I meant to be here when you arrived, but I got held up. There was a landslide that blocked the road and Meri - that's your horse - needs to be reshoed." 

"You didn't write to me, you jerk," Kyuhyun told him, finally releasing him. 

"What?" Zhou Mi's mouth dropped open. "I did! I wrote several times - you didn't get them?"

"No? You wrote to me? Really?"

"Of course I did! I wonder what happened - oh well, it doesn't matter now! Gosh, it's so good to see you." 

"I bet no one could decipher your chicken scratch," Kyuhyun grumbled at him, but he let Zhou Mi sling his arm around his shoulder and they walked back together to collect the horses before heading down to the inn. 

Kyuhyun waited with Zhou Mi as he stabled the horses, somehow managing to hold all his questions inside. He even managed to wait until Zhou Mi greeted Sunyoung, waited until Zhou Mi paid her for a night's lodging, waited until Zhou Mi pulled him upstairs into the room that Kyuhyun had been staying in. 

"It's okay if we share a room, right?" Zhou Mi asked, slinging the bag he'd been carrying into the corner. "We should save our money. I can sleep on the floor." 

It was fine, of course, Kyuhyun didn't mind at all, but he was bursting with questions, and even though time had passed Zhou Mi could still read as easily as before. 

"Just let me quickly wash up - I'm all dusty from the road. Then I'll tell you everything!" 

Kyuhyun sat on the bed, impatience making him bounce a little as he waited for Zhou Mi to come back. As soon as he entered the room again, Kyuhyun shot up, grabbing his wrist and making him sit down. "Okay - now - tell me everything!"

Zhou Mi began his story from the beginning - how, when he'd left the orphanage he had stayed at the inn for a couple of days - just as everyone else had. During that time he had a couple of odd jobs, earning a small amount of money, and then he'd began his journey west, initially hitching a ride with a family headed that way for a wedding. He'd visited several towns and villages, sometimes staying for a couple of months, earning his keep and saving money by doing whatever work he could come across, until he saved up enough money to buy himself a horse. 

"I travelled for over a year, until I realised I should probably make my way back," Zhou Mi told him. He was cut off in telling Kyuhyun more by a strong cough, racking through his body. "Sorry," he said in between coughs. "I seem to have caught a cold."

Kyuhyun rubbed his back while he wheezed. When Zhou Mi recovered, Kyuhyun asked, "Did you go to the sea?" 

"No - I was waiting for you. Also, we need supplies and money before we can head that way, so that's what I was doing while I waited." Zhou Mi grinned at him brightly, his smile so familiar, one that Kyuhyun had missed so much, that his heart squeezed. 

"I can't believe you're here," Kyuhyun confessed. "I thought… maybe you'd forgotten me."

"What!" Zhou Mi reached to him, wrapping an arm around his waist and pulling him close until he was tucked into the curve of his body. "Never. I promised to come back for you, didn't I?"

"I know. You did. It's just… you weren't here and I thought maybe…" 

"No, no," Zhou Mi said reassuringly. "You're my best friend. You stuck up for me when I had nothing, no one. I would never." 

Hearing those words both lifted Kyuhyun's heart and also made it sink. Best friends. Yes, that's exactly what they were, but Zhou Mi didn't seem to realise that Kyuhyun wanted more. Kyuhyun caught Lya's eye, and he could tell what she was thinking. "No," he mouthed at her. It wasn't the right time. Her tail flicked in discontent but she stayed quiet.

 

\---

 

Zhou Mi stroked his hand down Meri's nose gently. After he'd finished updating Kyuhyun, they'd headed to the village farrier to have her reshoed. Meri whinnied as the farrier worked on her, but she was otherwise docile. Which was a good thing in Kyuhyun's opinion - he'd never ridden before and needed the calmest horse possible. 

Once Meri was successfully shod, they walked her back to the inn. Zhou Mi was in a good mood, and it was infectious, and he walked with his arm around Kyuhyun's shoulder. It was as if no time had passed, as if they were the same two boys back in the orphanage.

"When we get back," Zhou Mi was telling Kyuhyun, referring to when they returned to the inn, "I'll show you the map. I've got a rough route planned --" and he paused at that, as if realising that he hadn't given Kyuhyun an opportunity to provide input. "Umm, of course we can change it if you want!" There was another pause, and then he said, "You do still want to come, right? Because you don't have to, I mean, I understand if --" 

Kyuhyun realised that he'd never actually told Zhou Mi he was happy to go with him, they'd both been working on assumptions. "No, I want to come. And I'm happy with whatever you've got planned."

Zhou Mi broke into a relieved smile and he gave Kyuhyun's shoulder a squeeze. "Phew. It wouldn't be the same without you."

The medallion around Kyuhyun's neck grew warm against his chest. He had forgotten about it until then, and he pulled it out of his shirt. "I forgot to give this back to you." As soon as it was no longer touching his skin, Kyuhyun felt strange, like there was something missing. 

Zhou Mi glanced at it, smiling. "Keep it for now. I'll take it back later." He stopped walking so he could tuck it back under Kyuhyun's shirt, patting it gently through the material. "Keep it safe for me." 

Even though it was rightfully Zhou Mi's, Kyuhyun didn't protest too much. Oddly, it felt like it belonged to him now. 

"Do you know anything about it?" Kyuhyun asked him. "It heats up sometimes? Did it ever do that for you?"

"No?" Zhou Mi seemed confused at his question, and then he said, "Maybe you're just imagining it. It's probably just warming up because of your body temperature." Kyuhyun knew that he hadn't imagined the way it had burnt his skin the other day, but he let it drop, not knowing how to explain it and not wanting Zhou Mi to think that he was crazy. He'd only just come back. 

 

\---

 

They left the village the next morning, after Zhou Mi had outlined his plans for them. When they farewelled Sunyoung, Kyuhyun did his best not to be jealous when Zhou Mi gave her a big hug. 

He could feel Lya's impatience with him. "Why don't you just tell him?"

"I will!"

"Why don't you tell him SOON?" 

"We just met again - am I meant to just blurt it out? There's a right time and place for everything." 

Lya flicked her tail in disgust, and if she could've rolled her eyes she would've. "Hopeless," she said, flouncing off to Zhou Mi's daemon who was waiting patiently by Zhou Mi's side. 

Kyuhyun wondered why he couldn't have an obedient daemon like the lioness. 

"I know what you're thinking!" Lya shouted back at him. 

Amused, he followed her over to Sunyoung and Zhou Mi. When he reached them, Sunyoung pulled him into a hug too. She smelt a little like the aroma that the rushes and flowers from the hall's floor gave off, a scent both familiar and comforting after his time at the inn. "Bye Kyuhyun," she told him. "Look after one another. Oh, and I have something for you." She reached into her pocket, handing him a package wrapped in brown paper, tied up with string. Whatever was inside had seeped through the wrapping a little, leaving small oil spots. "For the road. Someone told me you have a fondness for honeycakes." 

Kyuhyun was floored by her kindness and sweetness, regretting his earlier bout of jealousy, and thanked her profusely. 

It was time to leave. Zhou Mi handed Kyuhyun Meri's lead and they waved goodbye to Sunyoung. Rather than ride, they'd decided to walk and have the horses carry supplies. They'd tested Kyuhyun's riding skills the previous day, and without any previous experience he was particularly unelegant on horseback - to the extent that Zhou Mi worried that he was going to fall off and hurt himself. 

"We'll work up to you riding," Zhou Mi had suggested instead. 

It was over a full day's travel to the next village, but despite that Zhou Mi didn't seem to be in a rush, keeping their pace slow. They'd pored over his map the previous evening. They were heading north, towards the mountain range that sat like a large spine, running east to west across the landscape. Once past those, they would be a week or two away from the ocean. 

All up, their journey was expected to take several months. 

The worst of winter had passed, and although it wasn't that warm, the day was sunny and the air temperature comfortable. The region they lived in was scarcely populated and although they passed farms, they only saw one person in a field as they walked. Zhou Mi lifted his arm, giving them a wave, looking very pleased when they waved back. 

After a couple of hours of walking, and despite a full breakfast, Kyuhyun's stomach growled and he remembered the honeycakes that Sunyoung had given him. They found a tree by the side of the road, tethering the horses, and took a break. 

Kyuhyun and Zhou Mi sat under the branches in the shade, leaning back against the trunk, and Kyuhyun broke one of the honeycakes in half and passed it over. They sat in companionable silence while they ate. As he chewed, Kyuhyun wondered if it was still as good as the first one he'd tried. It was no longer warm, but it was still sweet and oozy, the pastry having a slight chewiness that he found quite pleasing. He had almost come to a determination when his thoughts were interrupted by a sticky finger being dragged down his cheek.

"Hey!"

"Someone's thinking too hard," Zhou Mi teased. "I can practically see steam coming out of your ears."

"I was thinking about the honeycake," Kyuhyun confessed, and Zhou Mi roared with laughter. 

"Really? You looked like you were contemplating the meaning of life. I should've guessed you only think that hard about food." 

"Yeah well you don't think hard about ANYTHING," Kyuhyun said in faux-outrage. He dipped his fingers into the remnants of his honeycake and dabbed it on Zhou Mi's nose. "There." He poked his tongue out at Zhou Mi, laughing at his friend who gasped at the retaliation. Then he was being tackled to the ground, flailing helplessly on his back as Zhou Mi decorated his face with bits of honey, squirming as he tried to dislodge him.

Finally Zhou Mi relented, letting Kyuhyun sit back up. They were both breathless with laughter, and Kyuhyun felt giddy. He'd missed this. It had been a lonely two years without him. There was no one else that he felt so lighthearted and comfortable with, so able to be his true self. 

"You look stupid," Zhou Mi told him, but he dug into his pocket and found a worn handkerchief which he used to clean Kyuhyun's face, his tongue captured in his teeth as he gently scrubbed at Kyuhyun's skin. "There, back to being handsome again," he smiled, and Kyuhyun didn't know if he was teasing him. He assumed he was.

"Don't tease me," he grumped, pushing Zhou Mi's hand away. 

"I'm not!" Zhou Mi protested. "You grew up well - you're very handsome," he said, patting Kyuhyun's cheek with a clean hand. 

Kyuhyun felt hot and he knew that he'd gone bright red with the compliment. "Shut up," he said, pushing himself to his feet, refusing to look at his friend. "C'mon lazy, we should keep moving." 

 

\---

 

They didn't make it as far as the next village before night fell, but Zhou Mi managed to sweet talk a farmer into letting them sleep in his barn. Kyuhyun had always known his friend was sweet, although a bit silly, but he'd never realised how charming Zhou Mi could be. In addition to a place to sleep, he also managed to convince the farmer into feeding them both dinner. 

Admittedly, this was in exchange for doing a few chores. But if Kyuhyun had been on the receiving end of that charm, he would've signed over everything he owned. Perhaps he was biased though.

The chores included splitting wood, and it wasn't long until Kyuhyun let his arms drop, the head of the axe he was holding falling to the ground in a thump. He had sweat rolling down his back, off his face, and every muscle in his upper body hurt. Zhou Mi was sitting at a safe distance, watching with amusement. 

"You only managed to split 5," Zhou Mi stated, laughing at Kyuhyun's pathetic effort.

"I caaaaan't," Kyuhyun whined at him. "I can't do anymore. Everything hurts!" It wasn't just the log splitting. Prior to this they'd shifted hay bales and swept the barn.

"Okay, okay," Zhou Mi relented, as Kyuhyun knew he would. "Let me take over." 

He took the axe from Kyuhyun, shooing him to one side. Kyuhyun watched as he placed a log on the chopping block, lifting the axe straight up above his head in a practiced motion, knees flexing and arms straight, letting gravity guide the axe back down. The log split all the way through in one swing.

"You're practically drooling," Lya said to him, quietly enough that Zhou Mi couldn't hear. 

"What? No I'm not!" 

If Lya could grin, she would be. In any event, he could feel her laughing at him. Okay, perhaps he had been admiring the way Zhou Mi's muscles were shifting and flexing as he worked - but only because it made it look so easy. 

"Sureeee," Lya muttered. 

It was only because Kyuhyun was watching so closely that he noticed the moment Zhou Mi's eyes glazed over, just as he was about to bring the axe down. 

"Mi!" he shouted at him. "Play attention!"

Zhou Mi gave a little shake of his head, eyes clearing, relaxing his arms to bring the axe down carefully. He blinked at Kyuhyun. "What is it?" 

Had Kyuhyun imagined it? He doubted himself now. "Umm… nothing. Just be careful." 

Zhou Mi continued his task. After he split the last log he set the axe down carefully and looked at his pile of firewood in satisfaction. "Can you help me stack them?" he asked Kyuhyun as he ran an arm across his forehead, mopping up the beads of sweat with his sleeve. Kyuhyun went over to help him out, and fortunately that was the end of the chores for the night. It was almost fully dark, and they headed into the farmer's home for dinner.

Zhou Mi and the farmer chatted easily over the meal, while the rest of the farmer's family eyed them a little suspiciously. The farmer had a wife, and twin daughters, who weren't much younger than Kyuhyun. The food was simple but comforting - a stew and freshly baked bread - similar to something they would've been served in the orphanage, and Kyuhyun ate it up eagerly. After dinner, they both thanked the family and headed to the barn. The farmer had given them a bucket, which they filled up at the well to wash up before they went to sleep.

Outside the barn, Zhou Mi dipped a cloth into the bucket, running it across the back of his neck and over his face, before removing his shirt so he could clean his body. Kyuhyun did his best to avert his eyes, knowing that Lya was laughing to herself. He wasn't looking - he _wasn't_ , he told himself, he was just there and waiting for his turn to clean up. 

"You should ask if he wants help washing his back," Lya said, and Kyuhyun gave her a gentle kick with his foot, hissing at her to shut up. 

"Your turn!" Zhou Mi announced, holding out the washcloth, still shirtless and slightly damp from the water. Kyuhyun gulped, taking the cloth from him. 

"Thanks," he said, keeping his eyes down and hoping that Zhou Mi would leave so he could clean up without having to expose himself. "Umm. You don't have to wait for me."

"Really?" Zhou Mi asked. "But we only have one lamp." The lamp was sitting on a post near them, and it was their only source of light.

"Yeah. You can take it. I'll see you soon - there's enough light that I can see what I'm doing." The moon was only half full, but it was a clear sky, so there was just enough moonlight to keep the night from being too dark. 

"Umm. Okay." Zhou Mi sounded doubtful, but he picked up the lamp and his shirt and headed to the barn. Their horses were tethered just outside, and he gave them a fond pat on his way past.

After he left Kyuhyun quickly washed up before tipping the dirty water into the grass by the well, going into the barn. It was filled with hay and equipment, and Zhou Mi had found a free area for their makeshift beds. He'd pushed together a couple of hay bales and spread one of their blankets on top. The lamp sat on the floor next to the bales, and Zhou Mi's daemon was curled up by his feet. 

"Ahh, there you are!" Zhou Mi sat up a little, motioning him over. "Hope this is okay. You might need to get used to not sleeping in a real bed." 

Kyuhyun made his way over, climbing up and lying down next to him. It wasn't as comfortable as a real bed, with little pieces of straw poking him through his clothes, but Kyuhyun found that he was pretty tired after their day. He yawned and Zhou Mi leant down to blow out the lamp. Kyuhyun could hear him rustling around until he finally settled down. 

"Good night."

"Night, Mi," Kyuhyun replied, and it wasn't long until he fell asleep to the sound of Zhou Mi's quiet breathing next to him. 

 

\---

 

The time passed quickly, and they managed to cover a fair amount of distance each day. Kyuhyun practiced riding on Meri, but it took a week until Zhou Mi was confident enough in his riding skills that he stopped walking beside the horse as Kyuhyun sat up there. Despite this, Kyuhyun preferred walking, so they spent most of their time on foot. 

As Zhou Mi had said, Kyuhyun had needed to get used to not sleeping in a real bed. They spent many nights in barns, and even some out in the open - setting up camp off the road. It was fortunate that the days and nights were getting warmer, and tended to be dry, though they did occasionally find themselves walking with wet clothes and shoes when it did rain. 

Those days didn't help with Zhou Mi's cough, which kept flaring up. One farmer gave him a packet of herbs, which seemed to help a bit, and Kyuhyun took over the task of brewing them up for him each night. 

As they travelled they did odd jobs along the way, earning a bit of money. On one stop they picked fruit - apricots. It was hard work under the sun, but they were able to eat as much fruit as they could stomach, and somehow it was fun doing it together. 

About a month after they'd left the village, they came across a large town. While they'd been through a few other villages during their travels, this town was the largest one that Kyuhyun had ever seen. They arrived in the late afternoon, and the guards at the town gates allowed them through after giving them a short interrogation. 

The town had crowded meandering streets, paved with cobblestones, which eventually led inwards to the town centre and plaza. The buildings were taller than in any of the villages so far, all several stories high, and they appeared to loom over the narrow streets. 

Zhou Mi had asked the guard for directions to the closest inn, knowing that they wouldn't be able to sleep out in the open tonight. They walked the way that had been indicated, carefully dodging other people. Kyuhyun kept close to Zhou Mi's side - partly out of necessity, but also out of security. All the smells in the town - people, animals, food - mixed together to create a stench that had Kyuhyun wrinkling his nose, unused to such strong aromas after spending so long out in the open. 

After a brief walk they came across several inns, and Zhou Mi selected one at random based on how "welcoming" it apparently looked from the outside. They headed in to enquire about a room, meeting the innkeeper - a short man with a ruddy face and jolly nature.

"I do have a room - the only one left! But only one night?" he asked them, his pen scratching away as he wrote their names in his book. "You should stay longer! There'll be a festival in a couple of days." 

Despite this, Zhou Mi only paid him for one evening, and the innkeeper took them down the narrow corridor to their room. Though it was clean and of a higher standard than the one at Sunyoung's inn, it was smaller, space obviously being more at a premium in a more populated town, and there was barely space to lie down beside the bed. 

Once they'd set their stuff down, the sky was still light, and Zhou Mi suggested a walk to the town centre. They stabled the horses first, rubbing them down and making sure they had food and water. That completed, they followed the road into the centre, being jostled by people passing as they went. 

Kyuhyun wasn't used to be around so many people and it was a little suffocating. When he mentioned this to Zhou Mi, his friend gave him a sympathetic smile. "This is a small town by some standards," he told Kyuhyun. "I've been to one larger - one that was almost a city. And I hear some cities are a hundred - maybe even a thousand - times larger than this." 

Kyuhyun couldn't imagine it at all - larger than this? He was painfully aware of exactly how small his world had been. He kept an eye on Zhou Mi as they went, watched as he navigated the streets with ease, seemingly perfectly at home. 

Sometimes Kyuhyun thought that it wasn't fair that he was younger. If he was the same age as Zhou Mi, perhaps he would be like that too - unperturbed by the crowds and the smells and the activity. As if he could sense Kyuhyun's distress, Zhou Mi linked his arm into his, Zhou Mi using his body to block off anyone who looked like they might jostle Kyuhyun. Shi made her way to walk in front of them, her presence helping to keep people clear due to the taboo against humans making physical contact with daemons. 

"They might have honeycakes in the square!" Zhou Mi said excitedly, remembering Kyuhyun's love for the sweet pastry. "I'll buy one for you."

Though when they reached the square they found more than honeycakes on offer. There was all types of food that Kyuhyun had never seen before: skewers of meat cooking away, fat sizzling on the coals below and sending up the most amazing aroma. Fist sized pastries, golden brown, that Zhou Mi told Kyuhyun contained a filling consisting of pork and an entire boiled egg. Trays heaped high with flat puck like cakes topped with sesame seeds or nuts.

Kyuhyun wanted to try EVERYTHING, and wandering close to his feet, Lya snorted. 

"Oh! You have to try this!" Zhou Mi said, pulling them along to a stall with a line of people. The stall was selling what looked like thick slices of pork and grated vegetables in a thin bread wrap, the meat being spread with a green sauce before being handed over. Zhou Mi purchased two, giving one to Kyuhyun, and Kyuhyun mimicked the way Zhou Mi rolled the bread up tightly, encasing the meat and vegetables, before taking a bite. 

"Oh my god," Kyuhyun moaned. "This is so good??" Zhou Mi grinned at him with amusement and they stood in a quiet corner of the square while they ate. 

"Told you," Zhou Mi said in satisfaction after they'd finished. "Oh, you have some sauce here," he told Kyuhyun as he leant forward to wipe the corner of Kyuhyun's mouth with his thumb. 

Kyuhyun swallowed hard and willed himself not to blush. Zhou Mi had always been affectionate, but had he always been this touchy? Kyuhyun could no longer remember. 

It was confusing to him. The time they'd spent together so far, their physical closeness, the way he caught Zhou Mi looking at him sometimes - an expression that he didn't remember seeing before. Did it mean something more or was that just Kyuhyun's hope talking? He caught Lya's eye, knowing what she was thinking, and he shook his head at her subtly.

They stayed in the square for a bit longer, tasting more items, and Zhou Mi did end up buying Kyuhyun a honeycake as he'd promised. Then they wandered back to the inn, their stomachs full. Night had fallen and the streets had cleared out, and they took their time on their walk. Zhou Mi had slung his arm around Kyuhyun's shoulder, seemingly his favourite position, and he was chattering about this and that. 

Kyuhyun hummed in response occasionally, knowing that Zhou Mi was just talking and not really expecting an in-depth conversation in return. 

It had been a really good night, a really good month together, and even though Kyuhyun was quiet he felt very happy and content. He unthinkingly snuggled closer under Zhou Mi's arm as they walked, too used to it being just the two of them.

"F'king f'gots," came a loud sneer, so filled with disgust that Kyuhyun immediately jolted as he felt Zhou Mi tense. "You should be ashamed." Zhou Mi let Kyuhyun go, pushing him behind him, as he drew himself to his full height at the man who was lounging in the doorway of the building they'd been passing. 

"What did you say?"

"You heard me," the man said, spitting at the ground. His daemon, a large black rat, eyed them from his shoulder. Shi snarled, baring her teeth, as Zhou Mi's hands curled into fists and Kyuhyun was afraid as the man shifted, something glinting underneath his open coat. Zhou Mi didn't seem to have noticed it but Kyuhyun had an awful, awful feeling.

Kyuhyun pulled on Zhou Mi's sleeve. "It's not worth it. Let's go." 

"Listen to your pretty boyfriend," the man sneered, and Zhou Mi remained still, staring at him coldly, until Kyuhyun managed to divert his attention with another strong tug. 

"Please, Mi, let's just keep going. Please." 

He managed to pull Zhou Mi away, but he could tell his friend was quietly seething, with an anger that Kyuhyun hadn't really seen before. Kyuhyun himself felt ill, his stomach churning. Was Zhou Mi angry because that man had thought they were together? 

They made it to their room in silence, and Zhou Mi shook out one of their blankets to lay on the floor as a makeshift bed for himself. Kyuhyun stared at it before he grabbed Zhou Mi's wrist, tugging him to the bed. "Don't be stupid. We can share."

The bed was narrow but somehow they managed to squeeze both of them on, keeping a bit of space between them. It was only a tiny gap but it felt huge and when Kyuhyun sat up to blow out the lamp, he could feel Zhou Mi's anger simmering underneath his skin, all tense and alert. 

"Are you okay?"" Kyuhyun asked tentatively. 

"You should've let me hit him," Zhou Mi huffed. "Asshole." 

Despite the tension in the room, Kyuhyun snorted at that. "As if you're the kind of person who goes around punching people."

"I would for --" Zhou Mi cut himself off, letting his sentence lapse into silence. 

"For?" Kyuhyun asked. He wondered if he should ask, if he wanted to know the real reason for Zhou Mi's anger. It wasn't as if either of them were strangers to insults. "Are you angry because he thought we were - you know.... because that's gross, right?" Kyuhyun laughed weakly, hating himself a little. 

"What?" Kyuhyun could feel Zhou Mi staring at him. "No, no - that's not why. I don't think that."

"Oh…" 

"Do you think that?" 

"No...."

There was so much being unsaid between them. Kyuhyun still didn't really understand, didn't understand where Zhou Mi's anger had come from, but Lya was an encouraging presence in his head, sending him courage. 

Kyuhyun shuffled closer, afraid of his feelings, afraid of how Zhou Mi would react. "Don't freak out," he whispered, leaning towards him to place a soft kiss on the corner of his mouth. He could feel Zhou Mi tense, and again Kyuhyun was so afraid, but he had to do this, had to do this now before they went much further. If he didn't - if Zhou Mi was disgusted by him… 

"Kyu…" Zhou Mi said gently, turning his head to look at him. His eyes were so soft, in a way they never were for anyone else, and perhaps that was what made Kyuhyun brave enough to press his lips properly, but chastely, to Zhou Mi's, a light touch, expecting to be pushed away. But then Zhou Mi made a little noise, a tiny shiver, and he kissed back, tongue running tentatively along the seam of Kyuhyun's lips, and then they were kissing, slow and gentle, and Kyuhyun's heart started to shake. Zhou Mi's hands came up to cup his face, thumb running down Kyuhyun's cheek bone, and Kyuhyun's heart wouldn't stop trembling. 

When he managed to pull away, breathless, Zhou Mi's eyes were hooded, his mouth wet, and Kyuhyun didn't think he'd ever seen him more handsome, more beautiful, even as it tore Kyuhyun open. 

_I want you to be mine,_ he thought, knowing by that kiss that it wasn't Zhou Mi's first, although it was Kyuhyun's. What had Zhou Mi done, who had he met, in the past two years? Did Kyuhyun even want to know? 

"Let's go to sleep," Kyuhyun said instead, not wanting to talk about it, not wanting to think about it. He laid his head on Zhou Mi's shoulder and closed his eyes, trying to control his heart.

 

\---

 

"Should we talk about last night?" Zhou Mi asked after they'd walked half a day in silence. It was hot and their horses walked listlessly behind them, heads dangling down. Kyuhyun had successfully managed to shut down all conversation, had kept his eyes down and grunted in response to any of Zhou Mi's questions. But now Zhou Mi grabbed his hand, tugging him to a stop. "We should talk about it." 

"We don't have to." 

"What if I want to?" When Kyuhyun finally looked at him, Zhou Mi seemed troubled, mouth set in a frown. 

Kyuhyun didn't think that he was ready for the conversation. "Can I have the map?" he asked Zhou Mi, and his friend shook his head at him but took it out of his pocket and handed it over. The map wasn't that detailed, but it showed villages, roads, and major landmarks, and Kyuhyun remembered seeing something else a while ago. "We're not far from a lake - the horses could use more water. Feel like a detour?"

Zhou Mi shrugged, obviously unhappy at him, and they left the path, through the forest in the lake's direction. It was cooler underneath the trees, though their pace was slow as they made their way through the undergrowth, occasionally needing to hack their way through with Zhou Mi's knife. 

When they finally made it clear of the forest, and the lake came into view, Kyuhyun let out a gasp. "Wow!" On the map it had just been a blob, but in person the lake was huge, the largest body of water Kyuhyun had ever seen, stretching in front of them all the way to the horizon. 

Even Zhou Mi seemed impressed, his former bad mood momentarily forgotten, and he quickly tied his horse's lead to a tree branch under the shade before running down to the water. Kyuhyun followed suit, chasing after him.

They pulled off their shoes and folded their pants up to their knees, paddling around in the shallows. It was Zhou Mi who started it when he kicked a wave of water in Kyuhyun's direction, successfully soaking him up to the waist. That lead to an all out water fight, as they tried to splash and dunk each other into the lake's waters.

Lya and Shi stayed dry and far out of their way, watching them in what felt like exasperation. 

Finally, exhausted and completely sodden, they called a truce, flopping on their backs next to one another, just up from the waterline. The air was still, slightly cooler near the water than it had been on the road, but warm enough that their clothes would dry in minutes. 

Dragonflies, bees, and flies buzzed around and above them as they caught their breaths. Kyuhyun shut his eyes, basking in the warmth, content and peaceful in that moment. 

It didn't last long. 

Zhou Mi propped himself up on an elbow, the movement casting Kyuhyun into shadow, and he stared down at his friend. "Can we talk now?"

"No," Kyuhyun said, a bit grumpily. "We don't need to." 

Zhou Mi sighed at him, exasperated. "You're so bloody stubborn." 

" _I'm_ stubborn? You're the one who won't leave it alone!" 

"You don't think it's something worth talking about? You kissed me."

"So what?' Kyuhyun shouted, past grumpy and well on the way to pissed off. "I bet tons of people have kissed you!"

Realisation flickered across Zhou Mi's face. "That's why you're annoyed with me."

"No!" _Yes._

Zhou Mi eyed him, wary. "Do you care for me?"

"Of course I care for you, you idiot, you're my best friend."

"You know that's not what I meant." When Kyuhyun rolled his eyes at him, refusing to answer his question, Zhou Mi continued, "Do you care for me as more than a friend?" 

God, Zhou Mi was so fucking stupid, Kyuhyun thought to himself. Of course he cared for him as more than a friend, he'd kissed him, hadn't he? He'd waited for him for two long years, hadn't he? But he wasn't meant to, it wasn't allowed, and he hated that more than anything.

"I love you," Kyuhyun finally said, defeated and tired. "I _love_ you, and I know that I'm not meant to, but I love you." 

Zhou Mi just stared at him for a moment, before he let out a weak laugh. "I'm so dumb. So, so dumb." And then he repeated Kyuhyun's words to him from the other night, "Don't freak out," before leaning in to kiss him, lips pressed against his, becoming more forceful when Kyuhyun gripped his shirt and pulled him closer. They fell back, Kyuhyun dragging Zhou Mi on top of him without disconnecting their mouths. 

Kyuhyun could feel Lya crowing in his mind, "Finally!!" but he ignored her, dampened her emotions down, and lost himself in Zhou Mi, his brain short circuiting so it was only the two of them in the entire world. If he'd known - if only he'd _known_ it could be like this, he wouldn't have waited so long to tell him. 

It was Zhou Mi who pulled away first, breathless, and Kyuhyun marvelled that it had been him to cause that reaction in him. Him. "You're shaking," Zhou Mi mused, tenderly stroking Kyuhyun's cheek. 

Kyuhyun should've known that he couldn't hide his worries from him. "Is this wrong?"

Zhou Mi grew sad for a moment. "I think - we were raised with the best of intentions. But not everything that we were taught is correct. While I was away, I met so many people, and… I don't see how this can be wrong." 

Which reminded Kyuhyun of the other thing that was troubling him. "You didn't wait for me." 

"I came back for you?" 

"But you didn't _wait_." 

"Oh." Zhou Mi hugged him tightly when he understood. "I'm sorry. I didn't know I was meant to. I can't change it now, but all I can be is sorry. If it counts for anything, it didn't feel right, not like this." When Kyuhyun didn't respond, he said tentatively, "Do you want me to tell you about --"

"No!" Kyuhyun quickly interjected. realising that he didn't want to know, ever. "No." 

Behind them, one of the horses whinnied, stamping its feet, making them both remember that they had a lot of distance to travel today. Zhou Mi got up first, heading to the horses and untying them so he could bring them down to the shore for water. 

Lya bounded to Kyuhyun's side when he was alone. "Well? Didn't I tell you?" She sounded far too smug for Kyuhyun's liking. 

"Shush," he told her, getting to his feet and brushing his clothing free of gravel. Lya pressed herself against his leg, looking up at him. 

"I'm really happy," she said. 

There was a tiny flame of happiness in Kyuhyun too. It was slightly at risk, being blown about by Kyuhyun's worries and insecurities, but despite that it was still there, burning away. "Me too." 

 

\---

 

They slept that night in the open, setting up camp just off the lake's shore. 

As they'd stopped early, Zhou Mi constructed a makeshift shelter for them out of with fallen branches and large palm leaves. Kyuhyun laughed at his attempt. Zhou Mi's construction skills hadn't improved at all since the orphanage, but it was somewhat nice to see that some things at least didn't change. 

They caught a couple of fish for dinner - more by luck than anything else. It was apparent that not many people passed through his area as the fish weren't afraid of humans, and Zhou Mi managed to catch them with his hands, sliding them around their bellies and tossing them out of the water. 

They started a small fire to roast the fish over, speared on sticks. They ate the fish while still almost burningly hot, pulling off pieces with their hands. Despite not having any seasoning, the meat was sweet and delicious. 

Kyuhyun huddled close to Zhou Mi, watching the fire pop in front of them. "Maybe we could stay out here forever," he said sleepily. "Just here.' 

Zhou Mi pressed a kiss to the top of his head. "Right here? Why?"

"Hmmmm," Kyuhyun murmured. Out here, it was just the two of them. No judgement, no expectations. They could be, and do, whatever they wanted. "Just cos."

"You wouldn't miss honeycakes?" Zhou Mi teased. "And what about seeing the ocean?" 

Truthfully, that had always been Zhou Mi's dream, not Kyuhyun's. He waved his hand towards the lake. "There's a lake. It's water. It's close enough!" 

He could feel Zhou Mi laughing next to him. "It's not quite the same."

"How would you know? You've never seen the sea. It could be exactly the same."

Oddly enough, Zhou Mi turned serious even though Kyuhyun had only been joking. "I don't know. I just feel like… I feel like I know the ocean. I have to go see it for myself. Sometimes… sometimes I dream about it." 

That made Kyuhyun sit up properly. "Nightmares?" He didn't think Zhou Mi had those anymore. He still remembered when they were young and he would be woken up with Zhou Mi's sobbing. 

"No - just dreams. Sometimes I feel like you're in them too, except I can't really remember those ones." 

"Oh.' Kyuhyun settled back down. "As long as I'm not in your nightmares."

Zhou Mi nuzzled him. "Of course not!"

They sat by the fire for a bit, before Zhou Mi nudged Kyuhyun, rousing him from his drowsy state. "Let's get some sleep." Kyuhyun yawned as Zhou Mi dampened down the fire, and then he lead them to their beds - a blanket draped over a layer of leaves. Zhou Mi made him lie down, covering him with their other blanket, before crawling under beside him. As soon as he was in, Kyuhyun rolled over, curling into his warmth. He could feel Zhou Mi coughing a little and he made a mental note to brew up the herbs for him again. They were running low, and Kyuhyun wondered where he could find some more for him. 

"You smell like smoke," Zhou Mi commented, but he didn't move away, letting Kyuhyun cling to him. Then, just before Kyuhyun fell asleep, he said, "Were you really serious about staying here?"

"Why?" Kyuhyun teased. "Would you stay with me?"

Zhou Mi looked at him with big eyes. "Of course I would! It's just -- sometimes I get this feeling like I'm headed home. I know, it's weird!" He shrugged, seeming a little uneasy, and Kyuhyun kissed him on the cheek to dispel the tension that had arisen. 

"I'm used to your weirdness. But I wasn't serious about staying. The only thing I'm serious about is being with you. We can go anywhere you want." 

There was such a long pause that Kyuhyun would've thought Zhou Mi had fallen asleep if not for how tightly he was holding himself. "Gosh, Kyu… I'm…" Zhou Mi took a deep breath and tried again. "I love you." 

Kyuhyun could feel Lya's satisfaction radiating through their bond, so strong that he could almost taste its sweetness. "I love you too."

 

\---

 

Zhou Mi peered outside the stable door mournfully at the rain. Their progress had been slow over the past couple of weeks, the region besieged by storms, and they were well behind on their planned schedule. The weather was unusual for this time of year: heavy rain, lightning and thunder. They kept seeing evidence of the sky's unrest, finding blackened trees that had been struck by lightning. Some were so freshly burnt that they were still smoking. At one point a lightning strike had hit a tree not far from them, spooking the horses. It was far too close for their comfort, the electricity sizzling in the air so strongly that it had felt like it was crawling up their skin. 

They were fortunate that they'd met a farmer who'd taken pity on their bedraggled state, letting them stay in his stable for a couple of days. It smelt like horses but at least it was dry and clean. They set up a temporary camp in one of the spare stalls, a little haven from the bad weather.

"It'll stop soon," Kyuhyun reassured him, as Zhou Mi let out another sigh. They couldn't chance travelling right now - with the high winds and lightning it was far too dangerous. 

"I know," Zhou Mi huffed, pulling his head back inside. 'It's just… boring." They had done what work they could at the farm, but there was a lot of time where they had nothing to do. Kyuhyun didn't mind this, but apparently it was wearing thin for Zhou Mi. Still, Kyuhyun had some ideas. 

"Well… I can think of ways to entertain ourselves…" Now that he no longer needed to repress his feelings, his desires, he'd gotten bolder, more sure about what he wanted.

When he dragged Zhou Mi back into their stall, down into the clean hay, nibbling on his neck, Zhou Mi said protestingly, "Whoa, hey, we can't -- our first time can't be in a stable!!" 

"I don't see why not," Kyuhyun told him, shutting him up by kissing him. Outside the rain poured down, but his heart was warm. 

"There's a horse watching," Zhou Mi said weakly. Kyuhyun looked up - and so there was. The farmer's gelding had its head stuck over the stall, watching them curiously. Then Lya and Shi peered around the corner and Zhou Mi hastily pushed Kyuhyun off him, making him fall into the straw with a thud. 

"They know everything we do anyway," Kyuhyun huffed, rubbing the part of his hip that had struck the ground. Lya nodded knowingly, and even Shi appeared to be agreeing with him. 

"Shhhh!" Zhou Mi was saying to Shi, who responded with a bark of laughter. Kyuhyun couldn't hear what they were saying to one another, but Zhou Mi went bright pink, and then he buried his face into Shi's fur. 

 

\---

 

Eventually the rain stopped and they were able to keep moving again. It took another couple of days before they arrived at another town, situated near the base of the mountain range. From here, they would need to hike for about a week to reach the pass, the lowest point between the peaks of two towering mountains. 

The entire mountain range ran across the region's landscape, and while there were several ways through, this was the easiest one to reach. 

Once they were through the pass, and after descending the mountain, it wouldn't take long until they were finally at the ocean. 

After discussion, they'd decided to sell their horses. It was sad to let them go as they'd been together for such a long time, and Zhou Mi wasn't the only one who'd grown attached to them, but they wouldn't be much use in the mountains. At least Zhou Mi managed to get a good price for the both of them, enough that they decided to stay for a few nights in the town so they could relax before the climb. 

It had been a while since they'd been in a proper town and Kyuhyun was happy to be sleeping in a real bed. In particular, he enjoyed sleeping in a real bed with Zhou Mi, now that they were officially, properly, together. 

Which meant...

Their first time was equal parts awkward and wonderful. 

The room was small, in the tradition of all inn rooms, and the walls were thin. Kyuhyun was nervous as he waited for Zhou Mi to return from the wash room. It was dim, lit by a couple of candles, and he was sitting on the bed, topless. Despite how eager he'd been in the stable, knowing that tonight - finally - they could go further, he couldn't help but be a little scared. Lya was sprawled in his lap, and he had a hand idly stroking her fur when Zhou Mi entered, ducking his head a little as he came through, Shi following him. He shut and locked the door behind him.

Kyuhyun bit his lip and waited. 

"Are you sure?" Zhou Mi asked, crossing the room to sit on the bed next to him. Shi stayed on the floor next to them, her head resting on the edge by Zhou Mi's knee. 

Kyuhyun nodded. "I'm sure."

Zhou Mi trailed a hand down Kyuhyun's exposed chest, stopping at the medallion. "I like this on you." Kyuhyun shivered, and then shivered a little more when he realised what he wanted. He took Zhou Mi's hand in his, bringing it down to brush Lya's fur. As soon as Zhou Mi made contact with the daemon, Kyuhyun felt a rush of vulnerability, but also of overwhelming love and rightness, and Lya preened under the attention. It was the first time anyone other than him had touched Lya. Logically he knew that it was wrong - it was one of the great taboos - except it wasn't. It was perfect. 

When Kyuhyun stroked Shi's head he watched Zhou Mi's reaction closely, wondering if he would feel the same thing. Zhou Mi's eyes fluttered to a close, his mouth dropping a little, and he let out a tiny breathy sigh that was so wonderful Kyuhyun knew he would never forget it. 

Lya and Shi left them then, heading to the corner where they curled up with one another. 

From somewhere - Kyuhyun didn't ask - Zhou Mi had purchased a jar of scented oil. Somehow he knew what he was doing, and while Kyuhyun couldn't help the tiny feelings of jealousy at that, he was also grateful. When Zhou Mi finally eased inside him, slowly, watching him for any discomfort, Kyuhyun's heart felt so full, fuller than it had ever been before. 

"I love you, I love you, I love you," Zhou Mi told him as he took him, pressing kisses all over his face - on his lips, his cheeks, his eyelids. "I'll always love you - wherever we go, I'll love you forever."

 

\--- 

 

In the inn's main room, a couple of days after they'd arrived, Kyuhyun struck up conversation with someone while he waited for Zhou Mi. Zhou Mi was washing up before dinner and Kyuhyun had gone ahead of him. The inn was full, and all the tables in the hall were already occupied, though Kyuhyun managed to get the last two spare seats together.

He nodded a greeting at the guys already sitting there. One of them, middle aged with a large pot belly, struck up a conversation, asking Kyuhyun about his plans. 

"You're heading through the pass?" the man said when Kyuhyun told him. "That's brave of you."

"Brave?" Kyuhyun fidgeted a little. "What do you mean?"

"It's dangerous - y'know?"

"In what way?" Kyuhyun hadn't even considered the fact that it might be dangerous. Zhou Mi always talked about it as if it was no big deal. 

"Well the pass itself isn't dangerous - just getting there is. There's bandits on the lower slopes, plus wolves and bears. Often people get lost too," the man said. "The weather in the mountains changes," he clicked his fingers, _Like that_. People die up there all the time." 

"Oh." Now Kyuhyun was concerned. He didn't doubt Zhou Mi, but maybe he didn't know what he was getting them into. Neither of them had first hand knowledge about this region or about the mountains.

"I'm sure you'll be alright though," the man continued, taking a deep sip from the earthen mug in front of him. "I mean - you have a guide, right?"

They didn't actually. Kyuhyun hadn't realised that they needed one. 

At that point Zhou Mi joined them, sitting down next to Kyuhyun. "You okay?" he asked Kyuhyun. "You look worried." Then he noticed that he'd interrupted a conversation. "Oh, sorry! Hi, I'm Zhou Mi," he greeted the man.

The man nodded, giving him a smile and cleaning his hand on his pants before reaching it across the table for a handshake. "Nice to meet you." 

At that, Kyuhyun realised he hadn't introduced himself, so he did so, before turning to Zhou Mi. "Apparently the mountains are dangerous. Do we need to get a guide?" 

The man had started eating, chewing and slurping noisily, and Zhou Mi shot him a glance before he replied. "I'm sure we'll be okay without one…"

"But…" Kyuhyun protested. "Neither of us have been through it before. Maybe we do need help."

The man piped up. "I highly recommend it," before turning his attention back to his meal.

 

\---

 

Zhou Mi and Kyuhyun talked about it afterwards in their shared room, and Kyuhyun did his best to convince Zhou Mi to listen to the man's advice. 

"But," Zhou Mi frowned, "Surely it can't be that difficult?"

"Ask around then," Kyuhyun insisted. "Ask the innkeeper. Because if it is dangerous, I don't want to go." _I don't want to risk you_ , he thought. 

Zhou Mi relented at that. 

After some investigation, it turned out that it was true. While many people did trek the mountains without guides, it was highly recommended that they hire one. The innkeeper introduced them to one of his other guests - a guy named Tony, who often took people into the mountains. Tony looked to be a few years older than Zhou Mi, with a deep voice but an oddly childish face. 

They agreed on a fee with Tony to guide them through. It was lower than either of them had been expecting, which gave Zhou Mi some comfort that it wasn't just a big conspiracy to rip them off. 

They set off together one bright day, after procuring all the supplies that Tony had suggested. He was full of useful tips and Kyuhyun was glad that he'd managed to talk Zhou Mi into hiring someone. Their packs were loaded but Zhou Mi walked easily, a spring in his step, happy and excited to finally be on their way. 

The only bad part of having Tony with them was having to hide their relationship. Kyuhyun wanted to hold Zhou Mi, to take his hand, to sit in his lap during rest stops and feed him berries that they'd picked as they walked, like he'd done when it was just the two of them. It was hard to hold back sometimes, and often Kyuhyun caught himself reaching for Zhou Mi before he realised that he couldn't. 

They trekked for a couple of days. Here, the altitude was still low enough that the trees were tall and strong, and Tony used his knife to cut a path for them where the undergrowth had grown too thick. In the forest, the air was cooler than on the plains, which was a welcome relief as it was much harder work than their previous travels. Their packs were well stocked and therefore heavy, and Kyuhyun's leg muscles ached with the climbing. Despite this, Zhou Mi was in a good mood and it was infectious, and Kyuhyun found that he didn't mind the physical exertion. 

Tony was useful too, having grown up in this region and spending much of his time in the mountains. He was a keen hunter, mostly deer and boar, and as they travelled he managed to shoot down the occasional bird who had the misfortune of getting in range of the slingshot he carried on his hip. His survival skills were well ahead of theirs, and he was happy to share his knowledge, teaching them which plants and fruits were edible, the fastest way to start a fire, and even how to construct better shelters. The more Tony taught them, the more Kyuhyun realised how wholly unprepared they'd been. 

On day 3 of being in the mountains, they came across a waterfall. It fell from high above them, several stories tall, the waters plunging off a steep cliff into a deep pool surrounded by smooth boulders, before continuing its way down the mountain as a meandering river, twisting its way down through the forest. 

It was beautiful.

Both Kyuhyun and Zhou Mi gasped in excitement when the waterfall came into view. They shared a glance, then their pace picked up, out walking Tony, eventually racing one another to the edge of the pool. They dumped their packs down on the rocks, and looked up at the waterfall in awe. 

Tony caught up to them, chuckling and shaking his head. "You two act like you've never seen a waterfall before."

They hadn't actually, and despite Tony going on to tell them how this one was tiny in comparison to others, they were both impressed by how gorgeous it was. The water plunged deep into the catching pool, sending mist and spray off the rocks, and little rainbows gleamed where it caught in the sun.

Tony looked up at the sky, judging the approximate time, and told them, "Want to take a break for the day? We could stay here tonight." It was mid afternoon, and normally they would walk for several more hours before setting up a temporary camp, but neither Zhou Mi nor Kyuhyun were going to say no to that offer.

They quickly set up their camp not far from the edge of the pool, and then Tony excused himself, saying he was going to try and catch a rabbit for dinner. Kyuhyun looked at the water and then at Zhou Mi, and grinned.

"Feel like a swim?" 

Lya and Shi didn't even wait for them, jumping into the waters together. Shi belly flopped in, sending up a huge splash of water, and both Zhou Mi and Kyuhyun laughed. Zhou Mi's daemon normally acted rather serious and it was amusing to see her paddling around like an oversized kitten. 

Kyuhyun and Zhou Mi stripped off their clothing, leaving it in a tidy, dry place, well clear of any potential splashes, and - after looking around to make sure Tony had truly left - Kyuhyun reached for Zhou Mi's hand. "Hey."

"Hey," Zhou Mi grinned back, before letting go and ducking down to lift Kyuhyun over his shoulder. He staggered the few steps to the pool, Kyuhyun screeching at him, and dumped him in. 

Kyuhyun sputtered, rising to the surface, as Zhou Mi jumped in beside him. The water was relatively cool compared to the air temperature and goose bumps prickled his skin. 

"You were right about getting a guide, but," Zhou Mi told him, "I miss you." 

"I miss you too," Kyuhyun told him, wrapping his arms around Zhou Mi's neck. Zhou Mi almost sunk under his weight before he regained his equilibrium, legs treading water to keep them both afloat. Three days of not being able to touch and hug one another was far too long. They both moved in for a kiss at the same time, laughing as they realised they were both as eager as each other. 

"How long until we're over the pass?" Kyuhyun asked, managing to pull away for a second from kissing. Zhou Mi chased his mouth, nipping demandingly at his lower lip, and Kyuhyun smacked him gently on the back, sending up a splash of water. "How long?" It had been agreed with Tony that he would accompany them up to the pass, but they would make the descent on the other side by themselves.

"About five days, I think," Zhou Mi replied and Kyuhyun groaned. "I know, I know," Zhou Mi said at that. His words sounded reassuring but his tone was laced with disappointment. 

The only consolation was that they were in it together and finally - finally - Zhou Mi wanted Kyuhyun as much as Kyuhyun wanted him.

The medallion resting on Kyuhyun's chest seemed to vibrate, and on impulse he unhooked it from around his neck, draping it over Zhou Mi's neck. "It's time for you to wear it again," Kyuhyun told him, leaning in for another kiss. 

Now that they had some time alone together, Kyuhyun noticed how tired Zhou Mi was looking, dark circles underneath his eyes. While he was still in good spirits he'd been having a bit of trouble with nosebleeds and exhaustion, probably to do with the altitude, and his cough had never truly gone away. Kyuhyun had managed to get more herbs in the town but they seemed to be having less and less effect. 

They were so caught up in each other that Kyuhyun only heard the rustling of Tony returning at the last minute. Zhou Mi heard him at the same time, quickly releasing Kyuhyun, which sent him flying backwards into the water. When he came back to the surface, Tony was in view. 

Kyuhyun's heart was racing, convinced that Tony had caught them, but he didn't say anything. Once he was close enough, he held up two rabbits. "Got ourselves some dinner," he said in his usual cheerful manner. "Having a nice swim?" His badger daemon came to the side of the pool to peek at Lya and Shi, perhaps wanting to join them. 

Kyuhyun and Zhou Mi both nodded, although the swim wasn't quite as pleasant after nearly being caught. 

They climbed out not long afterwards, fingers all wrinkly and pruney, drying themselves off with a spare shirt. By the time they were dressed, Tony had already started a fire and had cleaned the rabbits, and they had just started roasting above the flames. 

Dinner was delicious - the meat a bit stringy but tasty, and a welcome addition to their rations. Kyuhyun sucked his fingers clean of the grease, then tossed the bone he was holding into the fire. Above them the sky was clear, the stars twinkling away. 

Tony was telling them about his travels, and Zhou Mi was listening intently, rapt. "And you've been to the ocean?" he asked. Kyuhyun smiled to himself - it always came back to that with Zhou Mi. 

Tony let out a burp before leaning back against a rock, his legs crossed in front of him, and nodded. "Once. Went on a ship even - but never again. I prefer the land myself. That's where you're headed after you cross the pass?" 

"Yup!" Zhou Mi confirmed.

"What's wrong with the land? The forest?"

"I don't know…" Zhou Mi confessed. "I've just always felt a pull… like I need to see it." 

"Huh." Tony obviously thought that was strange. He turned to Kyuhyun. "What about you?"

Kyuhyun sat straighter in surprise, not expecting to be asked. "Me? Ahh… yeah. Me too." He was really only going there because Zhou Mi wanted to, but Tony didn't need to know that. 

Tony eyed him for a moment and then clapped his hands together. "I'm going to sleep. Night boys."

 

\--- 

 

The longer and higher they travelled, the more difficult the trek was, and the more tired they both felt. They left the trees and forest behind, with the altitude getting too high for them to grow. It was colder too, and it was fortunate that they were doing this trek during the summer - though that was more by luck than by preplanning. The walk became increasingly steeper, until in some parts they were climbing hand by hand up the rocks. Tony did his best to select the easiest path for them, and again Kyuhyun was thankful that he was there. Without him, truly, they might not have made it so far. 

At one point Kyuhyun showed interest in Tony's slingshot. It was a simple weapon, its handle constructed from a thick Y shaped branch, the bark removed and the wood smoothed down, and small grooves cut in the end of the forks to hold the elastic band in place. Tony seemed to take this passing interest as an excuse to teach him how to use it, and every time they had a spare moment he made Kyuhyun practice shooting at targets.

"It's all about the flick of the wrist," Tony advised. "Don't aim directly for the target but just above it." 

Kyuhyun managed to pick up the skill, although he wasn't very accurate, often sending a stone too high or too low, but over a few days his accuracy improved significantly. 

"Not bad, not bad," Tony told him after Kyuhyun managed to successfully hit a target three times in a row. "But now you have to learn how to hit something that's moving." 

And that was much, much, more difficult. Lya laughed so hard at his attempts that she fell over, and would've gone rolling down the mountain if Shi hadn't caught her in time. Kyuhyun even caught Zhou Mi stifling a laugh, and instead of shooting his next stone, he threw it at him. "I'd like to see you try!"

This caused Zhou Mi to tip over backwards in his effort to dodge it, now laughing loudly. Kyuhyun picked up another pebble, chucking at him again, and caught Tony shaking his head at them both in amusement. "Children. Please." 

In response, Tony had a stone thrown at him too, the mood between them light. But it darkened when Tony said, "How long have you been together?"

Kyuhyun swallowed hard, and it was Zhou Mi who answered, tentatively saying, "Together?"

Tony was stroking the head of his badger demon. "Look - you're pretty obvious. I'm okay with it, but you need to be more careful." He appeared to be deliberately not looking them. "Not everyone is accepting. Don't trust others. You two are..." he sighed, shaking his head before continuing, "...so green. You don't belong here."

Kyuhyun's blood ran cold, and he knew that Zhou Mi had tensed up too. Finally, Zhou Mi spoke. "Thanks for the warning." 

"Maybe one day things will be different," Tony said musingly. "Maybe the world will change." 

Kyuhyun took a deep swallow, past the knot in his throat. Could it be different one day? Or would this how it would be forever - always having to hide themselves and their relationship? To Kyuhyun it was worth it - would always be worth it - but did Zhou Mi feel the same? He hated the fact that he had a twinge of doubt. 

"I hope so," Zhou Mi told him, eyes downcast, his good mood completely gone. 

 

\---

 

Kyuhyun could tell that Zhou Mi was visibly doing his best to forget the conversation with Tony about their relationship, so Kyuhyun took the cue from him and did the same. It was easy when Tony didn't mention it either. In any event, the last day of ascending the mountain was the most difficult - the gradient steep and the air thin - and there wasn't much time or energy for conversation. It was several hours to nightfall when they came up a crest and Tony stopped them. 

He turned around, beckoning them to do the same. "Look."

Kyuhyun looked back at the view. There were a few clouds in the sky and on the horizon but mostly the view was uninterrupted. Below, the mountain sloped downwards, ending at the plains, covered by a patchwork of villages, farms, and forests. Kyuhyun even thought - though he wasn't sure - that he could see the lake they had stopped at that fateful day weeks and weeks ago - far in the distance. 

"Wow," Zhou Mi breathed in awe from next to him. "It's so pretty." 

Tony came behind them, clapping them both on the back. "And this is where I leave you."

Kyuhyun and Zhou Mi turned to him at the same time, mouths dropping in surprise. "What?"

"But!"

Tony pointed in the direction they'd been walking in, away from the cliff. "There's the pass. You should be okay from here." 

"Oh." Kyuhyun and Zhou Mi's disappointed reactions mirrored each other. While they had known that this was coming, somehow it felt like it was too soon. Kyuhyun wasn't sure if they would be alright without him. 

Tony unhooked the slingshot from his belt, placing it in Kyuhyun's hands. "This is for you. Keep practicing with it. Look after yourselves - you'll be okay." He squinted at the clouds on the horizon, gathering and darkening slowly. "Looks like a storm might be headed this way. You should get going while the weather is clear." He gave them a few last minute directions and tips, and also a reminder that descending a mountain was more dangerous than ascending. "After you're through the pass, just keep following the mountain down. Be careful and don't rush - remember to go slow so you don't slip." 

With his warnings in mind, they bid Tony farewell, waving sadly and watching as he left the way they had come. 

"Guess it's just us," Zhou Mi told Kyuhyun when Tony eventually disappeared from view, the tail of his badger daemon the last thing they saw. 

Kyuhyun gave him a smile. "I guess so." A gust of wind blew its way up the mountain, swirling around them, giving them the nudge they needed to start moving. Kyuhyun pulled his outer coat more tightly around him as he followed Zhou Mi, right behind him as they headed towards the pass. 

As they neared, they could see how there was a split in the middle of the mountain - a narrow gap about two horses wide. On either side the mountain peak continued upwards steeply, almost vertically, so high it was covered in cloud and they couldn't see the top. Zhou Mi waited for Kyuhyun, linking their arms together, and they walked through together. 

On the other side, they took the descent slowly, trying to find a safe path down the mountain, keeping Tony's warnings in mind as they picked their way down the loose rocks. They didn't talk much for several hours, concentrating on descending safely. They were mostly in single file with Shi leading the way, Zhou Mi behind her, and Kyuhyun and Lya following behind closely. 

There was a note of anxiousness in Kyuhyun's stomach that grew stronger with every step they took. After a while the anxiety grew so much that he couldn't ignore it. He reached out for Zhou Mi. "Hey - can we stop for a while?" 

Zhou Mi immediately stopped, turning to check on him in concern. "Is everything okay? Are you feeling alright?"

"Yes, I just ---" Kyuhyun couldn't explain it - he just had a feeling that something _bad_ was going to happen. Even Lya was looking uncharacteristically nervous. "I think I just need a break," he offered.

It was starting to get dark anyway, so they decided to find a place to stop for the evening. Not too long afterwards, they found a flattish part of the slope, letting their packs drop to the ground. Kyuhyun rolled his shoulders, trying to relax his muscles, and watched as Zhou Mi attempted to start a small fire. 

The elevation was still high enough that there were no trees, only short tuffs of grass, so Zhou Mi's fire was pitiful and small due to a lack of burnable material. Still, it was comforting to have the tiny amount of warmth and light that it produced. Zhou Mi sat down by the fire and pulled Kyuhyun into the V between his outstretched legs. Kyuhyun leaned back into him, feeling slightly better with the physical closeness. 

"Are you feeling better?" Zhou Mi rested his chin on Kyuhyun's shoulder, rubbing at his arms before handing him one of the water bottles so he could drink. 

"A little," Kyuhyun admitted. They sat together for a while, talking idly and chewing on a piece of dried meat from their food rations. They didn't have much food left, but in the next couple of days they would be off the mountain and should be able to restock their supplies. Kyuhyun also remembered that Tony had pointed out edible plants, which they would be able to find as they travelled lower. 

Night fell around them, the air cool, and the moon rose slowly into the sky. 

It was Zhou Mi who noticed it first. "Hey - look at that," he said, pointing upwards. "Isn't that weird?" The moon was full, hanging large and shining brightly, and as they watched a red shadow crept slowly across its face, almost as if it was bleeding. 

Kyuhyun gulped, that horrible feeling returning no matter how hard he tried to ignore it.

Because they were sitting together so closely, Kyuhyun was able to feel the whole body shiver that went through Zhou Mi. He pushed Kyuhyun forward so he could hunch over, clutching at his stomach.

"Mi? What's wrong? Are you okay?" 

Zhou Mi dry heaved into the grass. He retched for minutes before stopping, wiping his mouth on his sleeve. 

"Mi?" 

Zhou Mi took the water bottle from Kyuhyun, giving him a weak smile. "Sorry. I'm fine. Must be something I ate." 

 

\---

 

The further they went, the more Zhou Mi seemed to struggle, each step seeming to cost him more and more effort. He remained in his usual good mood, but his breathing was laboured, and skin pale. He had to stop occasionally, being beset by coughing fits to the point that Kyuhyun took to leading them down. The further they descended, the more nervous and anxious Kyuhyun became. 

"I'll be fine once we're off the mountain," Zhou Mi told him, waving his hand as if that would dispel Kyuhyun's concerns. "I think I'm just tired. Hey - when we come to a town, perhaps we could go to a bathhouse. It would be nice to have a warm bath." He smiled widely at the thought, but it was a poor imitation of his usual one. 

A day or so later they finally reached the bottom, coming out into a valley with a meadow filled with yellow wild flowers. The flowers and grass were tall, almost waist high, and bobbed about about in the breeze. Zhou Mi brightened when he saw the flowers, picking up his pace until he was ahead of Kyuhyun for the first time in days. 

Zhou Mi came back to him after only a few steps, tucking a flower behind his ear and giving him a quick kiss on the cheek as Shi bumped Kyuhyun's leg with her nose. "Lovely. It's nice here, isn't it? It's not long now until the end." 

The end. All of the air squeezed out of Kyuhyun's lungs at his words. Even though he knew that wasn't what Zhou Mi meant, they seemed ominous. Kyuhyun could almost feel time ticking down. 

Kyuhyun swallowed hard. "I love you."

"I love you so much," Zhou Mi told him, smiling, leaning in for another kiss and Kyuhyun told himself that he was just being silly, that it was nothing. But then Zhou Mi started coughing again, so violently that it seemed as if his body was rejecting his lungs. 

Kyuhyun sat him down, forcing him to take a break. "Let's stop for the day," he suggested. "You rest. Do you want to lie down?"

Kyuhyun retrieved the blankets from their packs, stamping down an area in the grass, and laying them down. "Just stay here, okay?" he told Zhou Mi. "I'm going to get some wood for a fire." Zhou Mi nodded, coughing weakly, looking too tired to protest. 

There was a grove of trees not too far from the meadow, and Kyuhyun headed that way to collect branches. He worked quickly, grabbing any dry wood that he could find, so he could return to Zhou Mi. 

"I'm worried," Lya told him. "Shi isn't well either." She was prevented in saying any more when she decided to help by picking up branches in her mouth. 

They took the wood back to Zhou Mi and Shi, both curled up with one another on the blanket that Kyuhyun had spread on the ground. Kyuhyun found some rocks to build a circle in which he could start a fire, and then he gave Zhou Mi a gentle nudge. 

"Do you want some water?" 

Zhou Mi shook his head, murmuring sleepily, "No thanks." 

It was hours until nightfall, but Kyuhyun laid down with Zhou Mi, hooking an arm around his waist and pressing his nose to the back of Zhou Mi's neck. He tried not to worry but it was a fruitless attempt. 

The wind rustled the grass around them and Kyuhyun trembled.

 

\---

 

Another couple of days of walking and they reached a city. Their pace had slowed so much that they were barely covering half the distance they used to each day, and Kyuhyun was relieved when they came across the city because that meant a place to buy food. They had completely run out of their rations, and it was fortunate that Tony had given Kyuhyun his slingshot as that had been keeping them fed for the past few days. 

Zhou Mi blinked drowsily at the city's gates, pressing his face into Kyuhyun's shoulder. "I don't want to stay here," he murmured. "Too loud." Even from outside the walls, they could hear the noise of the city rising up in a clanging dischord. 

"We need to buy food," Kyuhyun told him. "And it's been awhile since we slept in a real bed - that would be nice, wouldn't it?" 

"No, no, no," Zhou Mi murmured, clinging to him in a way he hadn't done since he was young, when he'd first arrived at the orphanage and Kyuhyun had been the one protecting him. "It smells weird and it's too loud." 

"You want to keep going?" 

"Can we? We don't have far to go - right?"

"What if we only stay one night? We'll leave early tomorrow. Okay?" 

"Suppose." He could feel Zhou Mi shrugging, the movement half hearted. He'd been like this ever since they came through the pass, and he wasn't improving. Kyuhyun didn't know what to do. It was frightening how helpless he felt. For so long it had been Zhou Mi pushing them forward, and now Kyuhyun had to take the lead.

Kyuhyun chose the closest inn to the gates as possible, supporting Zhou Mi inside. When he asked the innkeeper for a single room, the innkeeper practically glared at the way Zhou Mi was slumped against him. 

"A single room? We don't allow that here."

Kyuhyun stuttered, knowing what he was referring to. "He's sick, that's all," he said. It wasn't a complete lie and yet Kyuhyun felt ill about it. The innkeeper gave him a steady look. 

"You've come from the south?" At Kyuhyun's nod, the innkeeper told him sternly, "I don't know what's permissible there, but things up north are different, you get me?" 

Kyuhyun nodded but tried again. "We've been travelling for a while and don't have much money." That was true too. In addition to running low on other supplies, their money pouch was also feeling too light. It was just another thing to add to his pile of worries. 

"Fine," the innkeeper finally conceded. But he made sure to give Kyuhyun a warning. "Nothing odd, or you're out, you get it? I don't care how sick he is."

As soon as Kyuhyun helped Zhou Mi into their room, Zhou Mi collapsed on the bed, pulling his knees up and curling in on himself. Shi joined him on the bed, flopping herself over him.

When Kyuhyun ran a hand over his forehead to check on his temperature, he found Zhou Mi's hair soaked with sweat. He felt far too hot, burning up with a fever, and at his touch Zhou Mi opened his eyes, his gaze drowsy but fond. 

"Hey. How're you feeling?"

"Great," Zhou Mi said, smiling up at him, saying it with sincerity even as it was obviously untrue. "Stop frowning so much, you'll get wrinkles," he chided gently, reaching up to poke Kyuhyun's cheek. "I can always tell when you're fretting, you know. Do you want to talk about it?"

Kyuhyun was worried about many, many things. Where was he even meant to start? "Not really." But when Zhou Mi just laid there and waited, Kyuhyun finally conceded. "I'm just worried about you. Are you sure you're okay to keep going? If we stayed for a few days I could look for a healer and ---"

"No, no, we have to keep moving." Zhou Mi was interrupted by a cough and then he said, "I can feel it - we're not far from the end. I _have_ to keep going."

 

\---

 

They left early the next morning, the innkeeper giving them a black look as they walked out. Zhou Mi seemed oblivious - at least, Kyuhyun hoped so. He 'd been zoned out when they'd met the innkeeper the day before, and Kyuhyun hoped that he hadn't heard the things that had been said. 

Spending a night indoors, in a proper bed, seemed to have helped, and Zhou Mi was brighter, more energetic than before. When they were well free from the city, clear of any other people, Zhou Mi reached down for Kyuhyun's hand as they walked, swinging them a little.

Kyuhyun's heart swelled. Maybe everything would be okay.

Not too long afterwards, the wind carried a scent towards them, one that Kyuhyun found unfamiliar but Zhou Mi breathed it in deeply. 

"That smells like…" he said wonderingly, trailing off. 

And then the crashing of water became apparent. They'd been closer to the ocean than they'd realised. Zhou Mi grinned brightly, squeezing Kyuhyun's hand, and it filled Kyuhyun with joy to see him acting like his usual self. 

Their pace became faster, until they came above a small crest, and then it was spread out below them - the sea. Kyuhyun expected Zhou Mi to be excited, but instead he found him frowning as he stared at it.

"What is it?"

"It's not…" Zhou Mi said slowly, forehead creased in confusion. "It's not what I thought… it doesn't look…" he trailed off and they made their way down to the beach. "It's not right."

The beach was made of tiny stone pebbles, worn smooth by the water, and the sea itself was a murky green-grey. When they reached the beach, Zhou Mi leaned down to pick up a handful of the pebbly sand, rubbing it in his fingers. 

"This isn't right," he repeated, bewildered. "Why isn't this right? I thought…" He stopped, looking around, coughing a little, before he pointed up the beach. "Maybe we have to keep going further."

"What are you looking for?" Kyuhyun asked as he trudged after him, the movement difficult on the shifting sand. "Zhou Mi! Maybe we need to stop. We should head back to the city so you can rest. You were better this morning." Although, Kyuhyun noted with concern, he seemed to be deteriorating again, rubbing at his chest as if it was bothering him. 

"I'll know when I see it," Zhou Mi said over his shoulder, stubbornly continuing on. While his persistence was one of the things that Kyuhyun both loved and was exasperated by, today it was definitely the latter. 

Kyuhyun followed him until Zhou Mi reached a secluded cove, tucked in on the coastline. It was small and circular, with a thin sliver of sand that hugged the rocks surrounding it, allowing them to walk inside.

"I'm sorry," Zhou Mi began after Kyuhyun sat down next to him. "I'm sorry I dragged you all this way. All this way and it's not even --" Zhou Mi sighed to himself, looking so disappointed that Kyuhyun reached over to hug him tightly, and even Lya butted his leg in sympathy. 

"You don't have to apologise." 

"Yes, I --" Zhou Mi was interrupted by a cough again, this time a fit that seemed to last minutes. When he finally recovered, pulling his hand away from his mouth, it was red.

 

\---

 

Zhou Mi was fast asleep, head pillowed on his arms, and Kyuhyun freed a blanket from their packs to drape over him. 

"What am I going to do with you?" Kyuhyun wondered, laying down next to him. It wasn't even noon, but he could feel his eyes droop in the warmth of the summer day and Zhou Mi's steady breathing next to him eventually lulled him to sleep.

 

\---

 

Kyuhyun jolted awake. 

He'd been dreaming, and in it Zhou Mi had kissed him like it was the last one they'd ever share. Then he'd asked, "Do you trust me?"

"Yes - of course!" Kyuhyun had replied immediately, "Why?"

"Then follow me." Zhou Mi took his hand, and despite his confusion Kyuhyun followed, ran with him to the edge of the sea. "Follow me," Zhou Mi repeated as they entered the water, waves ebbing around their ankles and rising up as they continued in. "Follow me," Zhou Mi said again as a wave knocked them both off their feet, forcing them both under, into the depths of the sea.

Kyuhyun pressed a hand to his heart, his pulse thumping wildly. Even though it had only been a dream it had felt so real. Dying had been painful, more painful than he'd thought possible. 

Then he realised that there was something missing, at the moment Lya asked, somewhat frantically, "Where's Zhou Mi? Shi?"

They searched for the pair for hours, walking up and down the beach calling their names. Finally, exhausted and emotionally overwhelmed, Kyuhyun collapsed onto the sand, pulling his knees up and tucking his face into them. The sea surged upwards, foamy and lacey, almost lapping at his toes. He'd taken his shoes off earlier before he fell asleep, and under hours of sunshine the sand was hot and almost burning. 

But he could barely feel it. He was numb. 

"We'll find them," Lya told him, forcing herself in between his legs and resting her head on his shoulder. She didn't sound very convincing. 

Kyuhyun had no idea how much time passed, possibly an eternity, when an object nudged his feet, brought up by the ocean. 

Zhou Mi's medallion. 

Kyuhyun picked it up, hand trembling as he brushed the sand off it, rubbing his thumb over the familiar markings. He was no longer numb. His heart was in freefall, afraid of the moment it would hit the ground and splatter, and he was more frightened than he'd ever been before. 

And then it came to him in a jolt, a flash of clarity, and Kyuhyun knew what he had to do. 

 

\---

 

There was roughness underneath Kyuhyun's cheek, below his hands as they clutched the ground beneath him. 

His entire body seized with painful coughs as it rejected the brackish water in his lungs. 

The ocean, cold and briney, ebbed up around him as Kyuhyun cracked open his eyes. He dug his fingers into the sand, scooping up a palmful. It was fine grained and golden, trickling through his fingers easily. 

"Lya?" he called, pushing himself to his knees, and then to his feet before looking around. 

He was on a beach, a golden sandy beach. Several metres away a turquoise ocean gleamed in the sunshine. Lya pounced on him, jumping up and he only just managed to catch her in his arms, clutching her tightly until she began to squirm. 

Where was he? Kyuhyun's head ached, a pounding in his skull that mimicked the crashing of the waves against the rocks on the shore. 

The beach was empty, stretching as far as he could see, and although he shouted out _'hello?'_ there was no response. He was afraid, becoming more so, and he didn't understand why he was expecting a reply. He rubbed at his eyes, his lungs still burning from the remnants of the water he'd inhaled, his clothes sodden and heavy. 

Kyuhyun walked until he started to leave the beach behind, up the sand dunes and through the coastal grass to a dirt path. 

Lya cocked her head and took the lead. "This way!" 

They followed the path, coming across a sign post. It was a wooden pole, faded and blasted by the elements, with two signs pointing in opposite directions, equally faded. For some reason Kyuhyun knelt to inspect it. 

He found, carved in messy script, the initials 'ZM'. He ran his fingers over it wonderingly. The carving was old - smoothed down by the years and the ocean air. It meant nothing to him, and yet..

"C'mon," Lya huffed, head over her shoulder as she waited impatiently for him. 

They trudged up the dirt path. The air here was humid and moist, and again Kyuhyun wondered where the hell they were. The heat grew so sapping that Kyuhyun could feel sweat roll uncomfortably down his back, and his damp hair fell into his eyes. 

Lya came to a sudden stop and Kyuhyun pushed his hair away from his face to see what had caught her attention. In front of them was a building, single storey, but unlike any building that Kyuhyun had ever seen. It was white and made of sleek sharp lines, and an expanse of glass that glinted under the sun, so much that it appeared like it was an entire wall of glass. Kyuhyun's head was fuzzy but he couldn't recall if he'd ever seen anything like it before. 

There was a low fence surrounding the building's grounds, with a gate that was ajar. Lya ran straight through, ignoring Kyuhyun's yells at her to wait, bounding her way up to what looked like the front door.

"Knock!" she demanded, tail lashing from side to side. "Hurry up!"

Unsure, Kyuhyun lifted his hand to give the door a tentative rap with his knuckles. 

"Louder," Lya insisted. 

"But we don't know where we are," Kyuhyun protested. 

He was interrupted by the door opening. A lady stood there, tall and elegant, older than him, cradling a pure white rabbit daemon in her arms. "Yes?" she asked, looking him up and down. "Can I help you?"

Kyuhyun must've made quite a sight - he was still wet despite the walk up the beach as the air had been so humid, and he surely looked a complete and utter mess. "Sorry," he apologised. "I'm not sure --- my daemon --" His shoulders dropped, suddenly overcome by the events of the day. He had a feeling as if he'd forgotten something important. "I'm not sure, I think I'm lost," he said, sniffling a little. "Sorry to bother you." 

"Hey, wait. It's okay," she said kindly. "Come in - do you want to use the phone?"

"Phone?" 

Kyuhyun had no idea what she was talking about, but despite how stupid he probably looked she ushered him inside into the hallway. 

"Darling," she called out. "Get a towel, will you? And a glass of water?" 

"Yes Ma," was the response, and after a few minutes that was followed by someone coming around the corner with the two items. He was tall, lean, his features sharp but somewhat handsome, so when he came into sight, Kyuhyun stared at him, dumbfounded. The man had warm brown eyes that Kyuhyun could've sworn he had seen before. 

"Hi?" the man said, giving him a tentative smile, no doubt unnerved by his reaction. "Here." He held out the glass of water and Kyuhyun took it on autopilot, holding it in the air and continuing to stare at him until Lya nudged him. 

"Umm… thanks," Kyuhyun stuttered, finally snapping out of it. 

The guy bit his lip, frowning a little, before asking, "Have we met before?" 

Kyuhyun thought that the correct answer was no, but his automatic response was, "Yes, I think we have," even though he couldn't recall it, couldn't recall much of anything, except there was something deep inside him that felt as if he could map out every inch of that man's skin, his mind, his heart. Would follow him through all eternity, a multitude of universes, forever and forever, until time ended and there was nothing left but the two of them. 

The guy shook his head, suddenly realising he was still holding the towel. He thrust it out towards Kyuhyun awkwardly, his lips curling up in an oddly shy smile. "The towel."

Their hands brushed when Kyuhyun took it, and although he didn't know why, for some reason he felt as if he'd come home. 

 

\---

 

_I broke the Night's primeval bars,  
I dared the old abysmal curse,  
And flashed through ranks of frightened stars  
Suddenly on the universe!_

_The eternal silences were broken;  
Hell became Heaven as I passed. --  
What shall I give you as a token?  
A sign that we have met, at last? _

_I'll break and forge the stars anew  
Shatter the heavens with a song;  
Immortal in my love for you,  
Because I love you, very strong._

_(The Call, Rupert Brooke.)_


End file.
